tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-38713465403719973112024-02-07T22:03:46.866-05:00Charlotte's Webthoughts. ideas. advice. life. love. lessons. learning. seeking. gaining. knowing. inspiration. understanding. motivation. guidance. counseling. Just a vesselNyehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16050097056737271050noreply@blogger.comBlogger76125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3871346540371997311.post-22031397905867660382023-04-29T18:44:00.001-04:002023-04-29T18:53:04.294-04:00It’s going to hurt until you heal … <p> </p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEjh3o7sclXgaxcibd61AXaiZi8elyyjl9BrTJjN8u417wVfk0_ahbG9GW-Hf4SpMHo_7U--gmIIkPYsU0pyn48ayiRD-rht82kfqk4e3U5bgrJbTZlDcE0Im-rG9d1PM6yAXreGgjBYM05JmpadrERIniHAcJjwI3YRkE7JpYipoh1TFGqKxim82bMl" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="1058" data-original-width="880" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEjh3o7sclXgaxcibd61AXaiZi8elyyjl9BrTJjN8u417wVfk0_ahbG9GW-Hf4SpMHo_7U--gmIIkPYsU0pyn48ayiRD-rht82kfqk4e3U5bgrJbTZlDcE0Im-rG9d1PM6yAXreGgjBYM05JmpadrERIniHAcJjwI3YRkE7JpYipoh1TFGqKxim82bMl" width="200" /></a></div><br /><br />
<p class="MsoNormal">Have you ever been in a dark place yet somehow God still
used you to be a light for others? Every time I mention this line to others it’s
mixed signals; some are confused as to how the two can be and others believe
they know exactly the feelings that lie with what I ask. But have you ever been
in a dark place? I mean so dark that even the smallest amount of light can’t
creep inside. So dark that any ounce of sunlight doesn’t feel normal. <b><span style="color: #ffa400;">It
Takes Everything You’ve Got to Get Out of a Dark Place! </span></b><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">For weeks I have been comfortable in a dark place YET still
found time to be a light for others. Celebrating others, making time for others, attending events, traveling, being of service, being a listening ear for others, consoling others, sending gifts, loving others, speaking
life into others, making others smile and so much more. YET, here in this dark
place, I was still being a light for others. In this dark place where you feel
helpless. Where days blend into each other and time has no value. Self-care isn’t
important and rest is the escape from reality. It’s a place where you don’t
care too much about anything. It’s a period in your life when the world could hurt,
and you don’t seem to care.<o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><b><span style="color: #ff00fe;">It’s going to hurt until you heal</span> … </b>When I felt
uncomfortable, I would find a way to occupy my time and distract my heart. But
distractions only last so long and the heart can only take so much! Many of us
desire what we give to others yet don’t receive it. We count our blessings
while waiting for blessings that feel like they may never come. We become weary
from worrying about what’s next instead of focusing on what’s going on right
now. For several days I sat in a dark place … with my thoughts, my feelings,
God, my tears, and fears! Darkness has a way of recapping the light you’ve been
allotted on all those other days. In these past several days post-hospital, post-doctor’s,
post-darkness, work, and everything in between I have learned that sitting in <b>darkness</b> is
beneficial, as long as we are able to find hope and give it purpose. I was
prepared to let mine suck me in because I became content in such a space that
provided me comfort. <o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Then I had a moment and it came to me as such … The darkness
can feel very consuming, and often we feel as small as the stars in the
night sky, but there is something else that is really significant for us to
remember. At some point, every day, the darkness slowly shifts into light, the
moon and the stars keep traveling, and the sun rises and night turns into day. In
a Biblical sense to me, it means this <o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;"><b><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>John 1:5.</b><span style="color: #800180;"> <b>“The
light shines in the darkness, and the darkness has not overcome it.”</b> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">The good news is that regardless of how bad things may seem or how
bad things could get, there's always hope.<b> </b>You don’t need to sink in the darkness with light. You don’t
need to replace negativity with positivity. You bring the
darkness to the light. Like an offering. That means you
honor what is first before you try to change it. Sit in your
hurt. Wallow in your hurt. Feel your pain. <b><span style="color: red;">I KNOW IT
SOUNDS INSANE!</span></b> But in my darkness, I have learned that you must meet
yourself where you're at, before moving forward. Regardless of how many times
you run from it, it will always meet you again until you sit in your darkness
and heal … for some of us it will be harder than others but as Nora Roberts said,
“There’s no reward without work, no victory without effort, no battle won
without risk.” </p>
<p align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;"><span style="background: yellow; mso-highlight: yellow;">“To see a candle's light, one
must take it into a <b>dark place</b>.”</span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><o:p> </o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><o:p> </o:p></p>Nyehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16050097056737271050noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3871346540371997311.post-80691076742416705192023-04-16T20:50:00.000-04:002023-04-16T20:50:12.678-04:00... it's hard not to give up <p> </p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEgKzRUe5CF7A5WtB0-vqh-3fCZ9ZF8RQ5sZAVDeDpcDyYTfnrTCUhcoCJEDp3carae0VpxOOJLS5IngqQCnR-Bbf3xuy92PLREYZYb79UdfRRNmIbWZt3ictOfK_m6KH3wEDDIWHcfHTHZ5KDe6peJtbetxG3pUOypC60XFCtpjQdgAaCS_svK6zyfh" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="750" data-original-width="1200" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEgKzRUe5CF7A5WtB0-vqh-3fCZ9ZF8RQ5sZAVDeDpcDyYTfnrTCUhcoCJEDp3carae0VpxOOJLS5IngqQCnR-Bbf3xuy92PLREYZYb79UdfRRNmIbWZt3ictOfK_m6KH3wEDDIWHcfHTHZ5KDe6peJtbetxG3pUOypC60XFCtpjQdgAaCS_svK6zyfh" width="320" /></a></div><br /><p></p><p><span style="font-family: Shadows Into Light Two;">"Sometimes it's hard not to give up on finding true love." - Unknown </span></p><p><span style="font-family: Shadows Into Light Two;">Finding love isn't always easy. Some days it feels like a mission impossible and then many days it feels like "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me!" Looking for love is like finding eggs for under $3 in this economy and even then you begin to question the quality of the eggs. Are they expired? What's wrong with them? Am I being punked? The list goes on and on. It's all an adventure! You get to go out on dates, experience new venues, learn new things, meet new people, and possibly maybe the love in which you seek. But the downside of it too is that sometimes you experience horrible dates, and questionable venues, learn things you wish you didn't, and meet people you sometimes wish you didn't! As we get older the journey absolutely becomes more frustrating than fun and the focus isn't about really having a good time but whether or not we're finding the right one. </span></p><p><span style="font-family: Shadows Into Light Two;">Love teaches us lessons whether we want them to or not. Failed relationships are heartbreaking, depressing, frustrating, and draining. Nothing is worse than wasted time and when dating it hurts to invest so much time and energy into someone only to walk away empty. </span></p><p><span style="font-family: Shadows Into Light Two;">Some of us get weary and we begin to settle. <b>WE DESERVE MORE THAN SETTLING!</b></span></p><p><span style="font-family: Shadows Into Light Two;">Finding the love that we desire requires sticking it out and waiting for just that to come along. Find someone who you're attracted to, who makes you laugh, respects you, can communicate openly and effectively, and enjoys spending quality time together. If you haven't found that yet, then why settle? We all deserve the best relationship possible and every time we choose to settle we lose a piece of ourselves and what it is we really desire. </span></p><p><span style="font-family: Shadows Into Light Two;">Finding love isn’t always easy. It can be disheartening and may even feel like a full-time job sometimes – but don’t give up! It's always easier said than done because personally speaking I have given up and tapped out. I am very well aware that giving up on love makes me feel that I am incapable of finding true happiness with someone; but sometimes the givers are tired of giving and for once would love to be on the receiving end of the stick. In the past self-protection has always been my defense mechanism and eventually, I begin to alienate myself from others.</span></p><p><span style="font-family: Shadows Into Light Two;">I am a firm believer that none of us are here to be alone. Everyone we meet teaches us something whether we know it or not. It can be an ex-boyfriend, ex-girlfriend, ex-spouse, an old friend, a current friend, a colleague, etc. Every person we meet is an opportunity to learn something new if we allow it to be. In the past my bad experiences use to leave a bitter taste in my mouth, but what it has taught me is how to move accordingly with people moving forward and that didn't happen overnight. </span></p><p><span style="font-family: Shadows Into Light Two;">It’s easy to be harsh on yourself when your love life is struggling. If you’re thinking about giving up on love, then you’re telling yourself that you’re simply not worth the effort — and that couldn’t be farther from the truth. Maybe we are trying too hard ... maybe we aren't trying at all. </span></p><p><span style="font-family: Shadows Into Light Two;">Whenever you have those moments like I do remind yourself: </span></p><p><b><span style="font-family: Shadows Into Light Two;">You Are Worthy of Love</span></b></p><p><span style="font-family: Shadows Into Light Two;">"It only takes one!" 💕</span></p><p><br /></p><p><br /></p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEj1ZVmKyC8IQaSgAY9pvSj-Q_Fc83uZsHu-F8jXlfqyzeNggjt77Pf1ddHinr8rnfCVQUe29pl0gM7reN57hqtD4pKs0cz14eM8IQc9eoj2QOm_HJKwhwQQY9syeepvrno0YCd9bUv4mNpKaPP8KMNeaRuerF4SmCyoPOpQXGwOh7-GNel32r6B9vng" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="750" data-original-width="1200" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEj1ZVmKyC8IQaSgAY9pvSj-Q_Fc83uZsHu-F8jXlfqyzeNggjt77Pf1ddHinr8rnfCVQUe29pl0gM7reN57hqtD4pKs0cz14eM8IQc9eoj2QOm_HJKwhwQQY9syeepvrno0YCd9bUv4mNpKaPP8KMNeaRuerF4SmCyoPOpQXGwOh7-GNel32r6B9vng" width="320" /></a></div><br /><br /><p></p>Nyehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16050097056737271050noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3871346540371997311.post-22348989337927356812021-07-11T13:25:00.002-04:002021-07-11T13:30:08.454-04:00Growing through Grief <div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi_gEWVqslrrfe3Y9ZNahW1dHLKwt4Om-pme3tSL4xjy1pSKSZXEygPr_8Y2p08OVvUks6n11OUTEZdrroKvuj7b4WSSetaMmIybxn93fQNLRIUjRiv8LnRRy2mqaVGOkHPqws0fyNPmSk/s588/flower+grief.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="588" data-original-width="588" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi_gEWVqslrrfe3Y9ZNahW1dHLKwt4Om-pme3tSL4xjy1pSKSZXEygPr_8Y2p08OVvUks6n11OUTEZdrroKvuj7b4WSSetaMmIybxn93fQNLRIUjRiv8LnRRy2mqaVGOkHPqws0fyNPmSk/s320/flower+grief.jpg" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><span style="font-family: Josefin Sans;">I've learned that grief is a process, not an event. There is no instant fix to suffering. <span style="text-align: left;">There are no words for times like this or the moments one experiences. Neither pretty nor subtle words can ease your pain, take away the origin of what you suffer. Every loss is different. </span><span style="text-align: left;">Grief is hard work and there is no blueprint or timeline that works the same for everyone. We all approach, handle and express grief differently. Some days will be harder than others. Some days you will feel as if you're barely existing. The one thing I am continuing to learn daily is to be patient with myself. </span></span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><span style="font-family: Josefin Sans;"><br /></span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><span style="font-family: Josefin Sans;">Most of our pain comes from wishing things were different. That our lives didn't have to change from the pain. In grief, there may be many days when we feel devastated, preoccupied, empty and, yet, filled with loneliness. Other days may be a bit brighter, and it feels possible to grow from grief even though we know that growth may take time. Growth is rarely easy and almost always brings with it at least some measure of pain. </span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><span style="font-family: Josefin Sans;"><br /></span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><span style="font-family: Josefin Sans;">When we are in midst of grief, the very idea that we can grow through this devastating reality seems so unacceptable, it seems unreal, and unattainable. We have no choice about loss. We have no choice about the grief that ensues. However we do have one choice within our grief. Grief will change us ... whether we want it to or not. Things will never be the same. We will never be the same. The choice we have is not whether we will change—but how we choose to change. We can choose to grow up or grow down. ✨</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><span style="font-family: Josefin Sans;"><br /></span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><span style="font-family: Josefin Sans;"><br /></span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><span style="font-family: Josefin Sans;"><br /></span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: Josefin Sans;">"There is no pain so great as the memory of joy in present grief." </span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: Josefin Sans;">"Tears are the silent language of grief." </span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: Josefin Sans;">"Happiness is beneficial for the body, but it is grief that develops the powers of the mind." "There is no grief like the grief that does not speak."</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: justify;"><span style="font-family: Josefin Sans;">🕊 We can have all the time in the world with people and sometimes it’s never enough and sometimes we aren’t given enough time for people to show us the world ... 🌹 in grief, there is no stage called closure. Little by little we let go of loss BUT NEVER let go of love 💕 We’re never ready to let go. I read something that said “life is pleasant. Death is peaceful. It’s the transition that’s troublesome.” Because we often look at death as the opposite of life instead of apart of it. This thing we live called life is nothing but a brief intermission between life and death. I’m happy he uses me asmouthpiece from time to time. I’m dying inside to get there now instead of later. But praying my words to others suffice ✨💙</span></div><br />Nyehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16050097056737271050noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3871346540371997311.post-8299099277422153712021-07-01T15:06:00.000-04:002021-07-01T15:06:11.309-04:00💘 Love Isn't Complicated ... <p> </p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi7N-Nfvo8xOGS00rc9UH9v1JHBMhfG_yUdkYb_URi4-WtR8s6N3TktS6WZWfCoyPZENuXZ2RM_XsErziY87zh7CrOuQnBY3JlK_22d00R9sYDFEWx5LLcrzYGEHMYLVj0VQ_c0viIQrLc/" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="640" data-original-width="640" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi7N-Nfvo8xOGS00rc9UH9v1JHBMhfG_yUdkYb_URi4-WtR8s6N3TktS6WZWfCoyPZENuXZ2RM_XsErziY87zh7CrOuQnBY3JlK_22d00R9sYDFEWx5LLcrzYGEHMYLVj0VQ_c0viIQrLc/" width="240" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: justify;"><span face="arial narrow, sans-serif"><span class="gmail_default" style="font-family: "times new roman", serif; font-size: large;"></span></span><span class="gmail_default" style="font-family: "times new roman", serif; font-size: large;"></span><span style="font-family: "arial narrow", sans-serif;">It may be safe to say that no one has ever loved anyone the way that person wanted to be loved. We just have to accept the fact that some people are going to stay in our hearts even if they don’t stay in our lives. </span><span class="gmail_default" style="font-family: "arial narrow", sans-serif;"><b><span style="color: #ff00fe;">Love isn't complicated, people are.</span></b></span><span class="gmail_default" style="color: #444444; font-family: "arial narrow", sans-serif;"> </span><span class="gmail_default" style="font-family: "arial narrow", sans-serif;"></span><span style="font-family: "arial narrow", sans-serif;">People make love more complicated than it should be. Love should be easy and fun. If you are loved and love someone, I see no reason why you should</span><span class="gmail_default" style="font-family: "arial narrow", sans-serif;">n'</span><span style="font-family: "arial narrow", sans-serif;">t be happy. </span><span class="gmail_default" style="font-family: "arial narrow", sans-serif;"><b>{Alexa play Mary J. Blige "Be Happy"}</b></span><span class="gmail_default" style="font-family: "arial narrow", sans-serif;"> </span><span style="font-family: "arial narrow", sans-serif;">I think that every female has been in a </span><span class="gmail_default" style="font-family: "arial narrow", sans-serif;">position</span><span style="font-family: "arial narrow", sans-serif;"> where she has liked someone, but isn't sure as to whether or not he likes her as much as he may say he does. So, her mind tells her to step back and see if he will</span><span class="gmail_default" style="font-family: "arial narrow", sans-serif;"> seek</span><span style="font-family: "arial narrow", sans-serif;"> her. </span><b style="font-family: "arial narrow", sans-serif;"><span style="color: #ff00fe;"><span class="gmail_default"></span>Sometimes it works in love and sometimes it doesn't.</span></b></div><span style="font-family: arial narrow, sans-serif;"><div style="text-align: justify;"><br /></div></span><div style="text-align: justify;"><span style="font-family: arial narrow, sans-serif;">The truth of the matter is - when someone wants to be with you ... you'll know! <span class="gmail_default">They</span> will make sure you are aware of <span class="gmail_default">their </span>intentions and <span class="gmail_default">their</span> interest<span class="gmail_default">edness</span> for you AND ONLY YOU! <span class="gmail_default">Th</span>e<span class="gmail_default">y</span> will put in the effort and it won't go <span class="gmail_default">overlooked</span>. <span class="gmail_default"></span><span class="gmail_default">There are no games, no drama, no stress/pressure. I promise you that it is SO simple; people make it complicated. </span>We are all guilty of going after people that are wrong for us, trying to make those people THE ONE, allowing <span class="gmail_default">ourselves</span> to be stringed along because it feels right in the moment but in your heart it feels so wrong. Sometimes it's hard to walk away ... but always remember your worth. Always find the courage to get up and leave the table if respect is no longer being served! <span class="gmail_default">There's never anything wrong with having to eat alone for a while. </span>Too often many of us waste our time with <span class="gmail_default">human beings</span> who aren't sure whether we are the right one for them and one thing we can not get back is time, so why waste it! Relationships really aren't that complicated. <span class="gmail_default">People </span>make them that way! <span class="gmail_default"></span><b><span style="color: #ff00fe;">Real love is simple. Real relationships are simple.</span></b> When you’ve only had that complicated kind of love, when that’s the only kind of relationship you’ve ever known, you won’t know the difference until you’ve experienced a different kind of love - the real kind.</span></div><div><div style="text-align: justify;"><span style="font-family: "arial narrow", sans-serif;"><br /></span></div><span style="font-family: arial narrow, sans-serif;"><div style="text-align: justify;">It hurts to love someone and not be loved in return<span class="gmail_default"> </span><span class="gmail_default"><b>{</b><b>LIKE HELL - Alexa play Whitney Houston Why Does It Hurt So Bad} </b></span>but what is most <span class="gmail_default">hurtful</span> is to love someone and never find the courage to let the person know how you feel. <span class="gmail_default">A</span> lot of times when we are in a relationship we love, we go through the <span class="gmail_default">unacceptable</span>, knowing that the <span class="gmail_default">acceptable</span> that we get out of the relationship greatly outweighs anything else. Love is the easiest thing there is.<span class="gmail_default"> Again I repeat</span><span class="gmail_default" style="color: #444444;"> ... </span> <span class="gmail_default"></span><span class="gmail_default"></span><b><span style="color: #ff00fe;"><span class="gmail_default"></span>Real<span class="gmail_default"></span> love is simple. Real relationships are simple.<span class="gmail_default"> Love isn't complicated ... people are!</span></span></b><span class="gmail_default" style="color: #444444;"></span><span class="gmail_default" style="color: #444444;"> </span><span class="gmail_default" style="color: #444444;"></span>It’s the layers of doubt, fear, and expectation that make it complicated and the heart has reasons that reason does not understand. <i><b>Always remember that the game of love <span class="gmail_default">and the people who play it </span>is complicated, but love itself is not complicated. 💘</b></i></div></span></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><div><span face="arial narrow, sans-serif"> </span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span face="arial narrow, sans-serif" style="color: #ff00fe; font-size: medium;"><span><b><span class="gmail_default">** </span>Love is never complicated.<em style="box-sizing: border-box;"> Ever.<span class="gmail_default"> **</span></em></b></span><span></span></span></div></div><p><br /></p>Nyehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16050097056737271050noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3871346540371997311.post-10450019415576833202021-04-24T18:42:00.000-04:002021-04-24T18:42:03.159-04:00✨ Healing ✨<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgppfUpGUvfUyKsKO5ZMK4fz9AJH-YVuZbzMcFaNBEgswoKWDxrTaQb7KQCV3z2Z6kXJxCI9q8OI7mdxBBKz7vRlT5D7DV7SJvGiye0to7ZQD2k4Nc42-B1TxxYWCoJxpYHmX4P2ImtnPA/s480/healing-motivational-quotes.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="480" data-original-width="480" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgppfUpGUvfUyKsKO5ZMK4fz9AJH-YVuZbzMcFaNBEgswoKWDxrTaQb7KQCV3z2Z6kXJxCI9q8OI7mdxBBKz7vRlT5D7DV7SJvGiye0to7ZQD2k4Nc42-B1TxxYWCoJxpYHmX4P2ImtnPA/w363-h320/healing-motivational-quotes.jpg" width="363" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size: 14pt; line-height: 107%;"><span style="font-family: Architects Daughter;">2020 has taught me two things; 1. Healing is necessary and 2. How
healing is a lifelong journey. Healing is not a destination or a one-stop shop.
It indeed is a process that we must experience and endure with elegance,
compassion, self-love, and above all else … humility. As one layer is uncovered
in the process, then addressed and healed, another is almost immediately to
appear, requesting for the attention of its owner – self. Life is always
happening and that unfortunately is something we cannot control. It is an
inevitable cycle of circumstances, connections, letdowns, accomplishments, and
more. Despite experiencing many levels of healing, stemming from childhood and
adolescent wounds, I realized as life continues to unfold itself in its peculiar
ways, so do the inner layers within which need healing.<o:p></o:p></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size: 14pt; line-height: 107%;"><span style="font-family: Architects Daughter;">As humans we have a vulnerable soul, we have a heart filled with
emotions, we have a mind loaded with thoughts, we have a body that serves to
survive yet we have pain, which is oozing to be felt, we have scars that we are
expecting to fade away and we have wounds which are patiently waiting to be
healed. One thing I have learned is that it is important to know what you are wanting
to heal from. It’s essential to acknowledge the heart breaks, grief, losses,
and disappointments of your past in order to make progress.<o:p></o:p></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size: 14pt; line-height: 107%;"><span style="font-family: Architects Daughter;">One cannot heal without being able to find comfort. So often we suffer
in silence because we struggle to recognize that our comfort zone is an
unhealthy place for us to be in and fail to recognize that our pain is the
center cushion in the comfort zone. <b>Being honest</b> and I mean brutally
honest is the key element in the journey of healing. It took me awhile to be realistic
with myself and it hurt, but I was able to understand and see the things as
well as people that were beneficial for me and those that were damaging. Being
honest with oneself takes being willing to get out of one’s feelings, one’s
personal space and comfort zone in order to take risks. I never understood how
important <b>exposure</b> was until now. I have been fortunate enough to be
exposed to other environments and people and that have allowed me to see a
purpose larger than the box I was socialized to be in. Sometimes we have
experienced so much toxicity in our lives that it does not go away. But never
allow those difficult experiences to hinder your growth or purpose.<o:p></o:p></span></span></p><p align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;"><b><span style="color: red; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 107%;"><span style="font-family: Architects Daughter;">“You
cannot think you can heal from any pain, while you avoid it.”<o:p></o:p></span></span></b></p><p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size: 14pt; line-height: 107%;"><span style="font-family: Architects Daughter;">Healing should not be viewed as a destination … It is dangerous when we do so. You must start
to view and discuss healing as a journey. It’s like how our bodies work … We get hurt, we lose blood, the wound swells,
we feel pain, then, the bleeding stops, the swelling reduces, the pain declines
but the marks stay, etc. Same is how our soul works, yet it is more sensitive,
but it heals by recognition, recovery of the memories, acceptance of the disappointments,
tears for the defeat, remorse over the actions, and feeling whatever emotions
you’re getting in your head and allowing it to be your remedy.<o:p></o:p></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal">
</p><p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size: 14pt; line-height: 107%;"><span style="font-family: Architects Daughter;">But unlike our bodies our soul does not come with a clock, we all vary
and so does our time of healing. <b>There is no timeline for healing</b>. It
may take days, it may take weeks, it may take months, it may take years, it may
come back when any memory hits you again, it may come back no matter how far you
have come or how much time have passed! And it pretty much sucks to be standing
at the same point you thought you had moved away from and that is how it
actually works; and we cannot remove it from our lives. The bruises that are
physical are less harmful than the spiritual ones. It’s going to be hard, but
eventually and slowly but surely, with the help of faith, no matter how grave
the wound, it will be filled, no matter how long it takes, you will be Healed. And
healing comes with a price, but it surely will be worth it. 💕</span></span></p></div><br />Nyehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16050097056737271050noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3871346540371997311.post-36519500247332230792021-01-27T17:35:00.001-05:002021-01-27T17:36:33.270-05:00There Is No Right Time<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiVO6cR_R70GYLmegFlI3Z9mfGqckme47FdrckyYkHrd4F2TzmssO1I3fHuH5Dg-O8IWmcTBDgvK3qzjstmW6SP98ipr8mkUmP-cFlEmTshyphenhyphenSSP3D6EaIHg2prQfinsHaKoYK_H46rzpZc/" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="800" data-original-width="620" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiVO6cR_R70GYLmegFlI3Z9mfGqckme47FdrckyYkHrd4F2TzmssO1I3fHuH5Dg-O8IWmcTBDgvK3qzjstmW6SP98ipr8mkUmP-cFlEmTshyphenhyphenSSP3D6EaIHg2prQfinsHaKoYK_H46rzpZc/" width="186" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;"><span style="font-family: Harrington;">Timing may not be everything. But it is something. We can never time things precisely without luck or faith and for the most part, timing is out of our hands. There will always be other aspects and other people involved. There is no "right time" for love, success, happiness, etc. And this is not because the right time does not actually exist because trust me it certainly does. But we will not know when it is right until we get to it.</span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;"><span style="font-family: Harrington;">We will always be shooting in the dark and only recognizing how precise timing was after the fact. Things will never be exactly the way you want them to be. No matter the subject, nothing will ever be perfect. What is perfect anyways? In life, things will never be perfect. </span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;"><span style="font-family: Harrington;">Happiness is indefinable because circumstances in life are ever-changing. Happiness shows a difference from previous, sadder times. Happiness means that you have experienced a positive difference in your life and at ease with your life now and/or where it is heading. What we need to be happy is just one thing to be happy about. Often, we have to remind ourselves of the time in our lives when we did not have that one thing. Sometimes that one thing can mean everything!</span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;"><span style="font-family: Harrington;"> If you fully, truly want to be in a relationship with a person, it is always the right time. When it’s right, you find ways to work through the madness, sorrow, old pain, and exhaustion {excuses} of fitting potential newfound love into your life together. Everyone is different. We love differently and fully. We grieve differently. We hurt differently. But we are capable to love even when we are hurt! We all have loved someone with everything we had, and in the end, it just was not enough but don’t let it hinder new beginnings. Find someone who makes you feel excitement and gives you a passion that results in a burning fire and strength that is found behind their laughter. When you find that person who brings out the fire in you, don’t run from the feeling based on “timing.”</span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;"><span style="font-family: Harrington;">I have now matured enough, where I have learned to only look at someone as who they are are/becoming without labeling them. There is no right/wrong time... it’s always the right time to tell someone you’re attracted to them, or you care about them, if you truly mean it. Just like it’s always the RIGHT time when something good happens, regardless of if it happened by accident or it happened intentionally. Loving others is good. It’s always the right time when someone makes an effort to love someone else. I always say, “People make time for who and what they want to make time for. Simple as that.” </span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;"><span style="font-family: Harrington;">Some things just are supposed to happen naturally. But when is the right time to love? I think it’s always the right time, if you find the right person... Remember, there is no “right” time to fall in love with someone, so love deeply and fully and with no restrictions.</span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;"><br /></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><b><span style="font-family: Harrington; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%;"> </span></b></p></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br /></div><br /><p></p>Nyehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16050097056737271050noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3871346540371997311.post-60716979401430218922020-09-06T20:07:00.000-04:002020-09-06T20:07:06.903-04:00 💗💗 Forgiveness Is Not A Feeling 💗💗<p style="text-align: center;"><img alt="Forgiveness is a promise not a feeling, when you forgive other people, you're making a promise to not use their past against them - Post by abbie477 on Boldomatic" height="328" src="https://cdn.boldomatic.com/content/post/5q9RXQ/Forgiveness-is-a-promise-not-a-feeling-when-you-fo?size=800" width="328" /></p><p style="text-align: center;"><br /></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;"><b><u><span style="font-family: "Californian FB", serif; font-size: 13.5pt;">Forgiveness</span></u></b><span style="font-family: "Californian FB", serif; font-size: 13.5pt;">: noun: forgiveness; plural
noun: forgiveness’s<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;"><span style="font-family: "Californian FB", serif;"><span style="color: #800180; font-size: medium;">the action or process of forgiving or being forgiven.</span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;"><span style="font-family: "Californian FB", serif; font-size: 13.5pt;">Often, we are told that fear is powerful enough to keep us from attaining
our goals and living our best lives. But it's not always fears ... sometimes a
thing that holds us back is forgiveness. This morning's message during service
was titled "Let's Straighten it Out" in which the Pastor spoke about
forgiveness. Many people say that they can't forgive because they don't
feel it. Huh? What is it about forgiveness that we must feel? For a long time,
it’s how my mind operated and during service Pastor said something that struck
a nerve and made me say “WOW!” His words were: <o:p></o:p></span></p><p align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto; text-align: center;"><b><span style="color: #2b00fe; font-family: "Californian FB",serif; font-size: 13.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">FORGIVENESS IS NOT A
FEELING. FORGIVENESS IS A PROMISE!</span></b><span style="font-family: "Californian FB", serif; font-size: 13.5pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;"><span style="font-family: "Californian FB", serif; font-size: 13.5pt;">Think about it as such ... it's like trusting God or waking
up in the morning. God wants both of these for us no matter how we feel, and he
wants forgiveness in the same way. After all, hasn't HE forgiven us (and continues
to daily at that) and we probably haven't earned it either. <o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;"><span style="font-family: "Californian FB", serif; font-size: 13.5pt;">A wrongful perspective that many of us have about forgiveness is
that forgiveness looks too much like letting people off when in fact it is not!
But sometimes if letting people off is the price that we pay for having
peaceful co-existence then so be it. We imagine that getting even is an
end to it. But often it only formulates the ground for a new set of
resentments, and so the wheel of anger, bitter and violence just keeps on
spinning. Forgiving others who have harmed us is one of the most important
things we will ever do.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto; text-align: center;"><b><i><span style="color: #cc0000; font-family: "Californian FB",serif; font-size: 13.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">“Our happiness, or lack
of it, rises and falls on whether we choose to forgive.”</span></i></b><span style="font-family: "Californian FB", serif; font-size: 13.5pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;"><span style="font-family: "Californian FB", serif; font-size: 13.5pt;">We struggle to forgive because of the misconceptions that we have
about forgiveness. <o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;"><u><span style="background: yellow; font-family: "Californian FB", serif; font-size: 13.5pt;">What forgiveness is and
what it entails is</span></u><span style="background: yellow; font-family: "Californian FB", serif; font-size: 13.5pt;">:</span><span style="font-family: "Californian FB", serif; font-size: 13.5pt;"> <o:p></o:p></span></p><ul type="disc">
<li class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Californian FB",serif; font-size: 13.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Choosing to stop
nourishing the anger and resentment toward the person who hurt you but
letting out your hurt in a positive way.<o:p></o:p></span></li>
<li class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Californian FB",serif; font-size: 13.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Letting all
judgments toward the person who has hurt you be handled by God.<o:p></o:p></span></li>
<li class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Californian FB",serif; font-size: 13.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Actually,
getting to the place where you can say to the person who harmed you, I
wish for you a blessing on your life.<o:p></o:p></span></li>
<li class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Californian FB",serif; font-size: 13.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Giving up your
rights to get even.<o:p></o:p></span></li>
<li class="MsoNormal" style="color: red; line-height: normal; mso-list: l3 level1 lfo1; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto; tab-stops: list .5in;"><b><span style="font-family: "Californian FB",serif; font-size: 13.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">NOT USING THE
PAST AGAINST THEM ONCE YOU HAVE CHOSEN TO FORGIVE!</span></b><span style="font-family: "Californian FB",serif; font-size: 13.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><o:p></o:p></span></li>
</ul><p class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><span style="font-family: "Californian FB", serif; font-size: 13.5pt;">In that same token let’s also be clear that forgiveness can be
many different things to many different people but let me tell you </span><b><span style="color: #0070c0; font-family: "Californian FB",serif; font-size: 13.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">WHAT
forgiveness is NOT</span></b><span style="font-family: "Californian FB", serif; font-size: 13.5pt;">:</span><span style="font-family: "Californian FB", serif; font-size: 13.5pt;"> </span></p><ul type="disc">
<li class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Californian FB",serif; font-size: 13.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">To forgive is to
excuse or ignore the other person's actions. <o:p></o:p></span></li>
</ul><p class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><span style="font-family: "Californian FB", serif; font-size: 13.5pt;">If you could reason to justify the behavior of the person who hurt
you, then damn it forgiveness is not necessary. <o:p></o:p></span></p><ul type="disc">
<li class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Californian FB",serif; font-size: 13.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Forgiveness will
fix the relationship between you and the person who hurt you. <o:p></o:p></span></li>
</ul><p class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><span style="font-family: "Californian FB", serif; font-size: 13.5pt;">LIES!!!! Forgiveness doesn't inevitably heal anything
... Just because you forgive someone, doesn’t mean you have to trust that
person again. ‘</span><b><span style="color: #ff00fe; font-family: "Californian FB",serif; font-size: 13.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Forgiveness is a gift we give to others. Trust is something that
is earned.</span></b><b><span style="font-family: "Californian FB",serif; font-size: 13.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">’</span></b><span style="font-family: "Californian FB", serif; font-size: 13.5pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></p><ul type="disc">
<li class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Californian FB",serif; font-size: 13.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">To forgive, I
must feel forgiving. <o:p></o:p></span></li>
</ul><p class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><span style="font-family: "Californian FB", serif; font-size: 13.5pt;">There go them damn feelings again! We let our emotional state
dictate just about everything we do. Many things in life we must do as an
act of our will. IF we act right, our feelings will follow. Again ... </span><i><span style="color: #cc6600; font-family: "Californian FB",serif; font-size: 13.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">"Forgiveness
is NOT a feeling. Forgiveness is a promise!"<o:p></o:p></span></i></p><ul type="disc">
<li class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Californian FB",serif; font-size: 13.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Once we forgive
someone, they have the same rights and privileges they had before the
situation occurred. Forgiveness will make everything be the same
again!!! <o:p></o:p></span></li>
</ul><p class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><span style="font-family: "Californian FB", serif; font-size: 13.5pt;">The reality is, even if you choose to forgive someone, and the
relationship is healing, things still will never be the same again. <o:p></o:p></span></p><ul type="disc">
<li class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Californian FB",serif; font-size: 13.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Forgiveness
makes the person who is doing the forgiving weak.<o:p></o:p></span></li>
<li class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Californian FB",serif; font-size: 13.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">To forgive is to
forget. <o:p></o:p></span></li>
</ul><p class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;"><span style="font-family: "Californian FB", serif; font-size: 13.5pt;">Let me repeat this for the people in the back ……<o:p></o:p></span></p><p align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in; text-align: center;"><b><span style="color: red; font-family: "Californian FB",serif; font-size: 18.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">TO FORGIVE ... IS NOT TO FORGET!!!!! </span></b><span style="font-family: "Californian FB", serif; font-size: 18pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><span style="font-family: "Californian FB", serif; font-size: 13.5pt;"> </span><span style="font-family: "Californian FB", serif; font-size: 13.5pt;">Nowhere in the Bible does God tell us to FORGIVE & FORGET ...
God just tells us to forgive. Forgiving others does not remove the memory of
them violating you, hurting you, disrespecting you, lying on you, cheating on
you or any of the above. It is because we remember that the need for
forgiveness is real. <b>(SO REAL)</b> I can admit to being someone who
struggles with forgiveness because my thought of it was, well how can I forgive
if I can't forget? But the ugly reality that I am learning is when we choose to
forgive someone we are not saying that we weren’t hurt or that you will ever
forget that hurt because indeed it did happen; and the reality is that we can
forgive, even if we still remember. But with forgiveness and time, that
hurt will disappear. Forgiveness is not forgetting, avoiding, or excusing
what has happened. You don’t have to feel forgiving to forgive someone and just
because we choose to forgive someone, it doesn’t mean we won’t ever get upset
and have to make the choice to forgive them again. </span><b><span style="color: #7030a0; font-family: "Californian FB",serif; font-size: 13.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">BUT LET
ME BE CLEAR</span></b><span style="color: #7030a0; font-family: "Californian FB", serif; font-size: 13.5pt;"> </span><span style="font-family: "Californian FB", serif; font-size: 13.5pt;">… It also doesn’t mean our relationships must go back the way it
was and sometimes the relationships are left just with that; forgiveness. Just
because we learn forgiveness doesn't mean we have to allow the other person
back into our lives to do things all over again. Learn to forgive, then move
on. In spite of all these things we must forgive, and no one ever said that
forgiving others is easy. <b>BECAUSE IT IS NOT!!!</b> Someone once said, </span><i><span style="color: #0fa9b1; font-family: "Californian FB",serif; font-size: 13.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">“Not to
forgive imprisons me in the past and locks out all potential for change. I thus
yield control to another, my enemy, and doom myself to suffer the consequences
of the wrong.” </span></i></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><i><span style="color: #0fa9b1; font-family: "Californian FB",serif; font-size: 13.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"> </span></i></p><p align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in; text-align: center;"><b><span style="color: #7030a0; font-family: "Californian FB",serif; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Forgiveness has
incredible power.</span></b></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><span style="font-family: "Californian FB", serif; font-size: 13.5pt;">The spirit of un-forgiveness and bitterness toward those who have
hurt us is toxic to our soul and destroys any chance for a life of peace and
happiness. One thing that comes with being unable to forgive others is we
eventually build a wall and the problem with that is when you build a
wall, <i><u>no one gets in, but you do not get out either.</u></i> Thus,
you miss all that’s going on around you, all because you can’t let something
go. So many of us are afraid to forgive because we are worried as to who or
what we will be without the hate, unforgiveness, anger, and hostility in our lives.
Some of us live our whole lives surrounded with unforgiveness, hatred, anger,
resentment, and bitterness, so much so that we can't see or be anything else.
Don’t let yourself become emotionally and spiritually exhausted by refusing to
forgive. <b>Remember:</b> ‘Forgiveness is a promise, not a feeling’. We <b>must</b>
choose to forgive, then we <b>must</b> practice it. The lives we live, our
losses, our wins, etc. is what makes us who we are. The experiences we have had
develops us into who we are now and/or who we are yet to become. But, to be the
best at being us, we need to allow the anger, bitter, hate and unforgiveness to
go. </span><b><span style="color: red; font-family: "Californian FB",serif; font-size: 13.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">It is a silent killer.</span></b><b><span style="font-family: "Californian FB", serif; font-size: 13.5pt;"> </span></b><span style="font-family: "Californian FB", serif; font-size: 13.5pt;">Stress,
depression, stroke, etc. all caused by unforgiveness. To truly live, we must
allow the process of unforgiveness to start. Being able to forgive is one
of the strongest assets we possess. It will always prove that we are stronger
than the person who hurt us. <o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><span style="font-family: "Californian FB", serif; font-size: 13.5pt;"> </span></p><p style="text-align: center;">
</p><p align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in; text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: "Californian FB", serif; font-size: 13.5pt;">“The weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is the
attribute of the strong.”<br />
<b>Mahatma Gandhi</b></span></p><p style="text-align: center;"><br /></p>Nyehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16050097056737271050noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3871346540371997311.post-87877042100713924402020-02-13T09:50:00.000-05:002020-02-13T09:50:48.650-05:00Reason. Season. Lifetime. <div style="text-align: center;">
<img alt="Image result for reason season lifetime" height="300" src="https://i.pinimg.com/originals/67/75/f9/6775f9af776ea352f2df4a98954f27a4.jpg" width="400" /></div>
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<span style="font-family: "high tower text" , serif; font-size: 13pt; line-height: 18.5467px;">As I think back on the relationships I’ve had in my life, I can say that for many of them I feel blessed. Blessed to have experienced them. Blessed for the pain they have caused. Blessed for the lessons they have taught me. Blessed for how some have broken me down but even more for how some have helped build me up! I’ve had work relationships that were for a reason. I’ve had ex’s and friendships that were for a season.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "high tower text" , serif; font-size: 13pt; line-height: 18.5467px;">… And I have people in my life now that I pray are here for eternity.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "high tower text" , serif; font-size: 13pt; line-height: 18.5467px;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "high tower text" , serif; font-size: 13pt; line-height: 18.5467px;">I had to learn, and I am still learning to see each relationship as not so much a distressing loss, but this experience that I was fortunate to have in the first place.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "high tower text" , serif; font-size: 13pt; line-height: 18.5467px;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "high tower text" , serif; font-size: 13pt; line-height: 18.5467px;">No one likes to think of any relationship as temporary, but the truth is… people enter our lives for a reason, season, or a lifetime. When we try to force relationships beyond their purpose, we often end up upset.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "high tower text" , serif; font-size: 13pt; line-height: 18.5467px;">Someone once told me “People come into your life for a reason, a season or a lifetime. When you figure out which one it is, you will know what to do for each person.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<b><i><u><span style="color: red; font-family: "high tower text" , serif; font-size: 13pt; line-height: 18.5467px;">REASON<o:p></o:p></span></u></i></b></div>
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<b><i><u><span style="color: red; font-family: "high tower text" , serif; font-size: 13pt; line-height: 18.5467px;"><br /></span></u></i></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: "high tower text" , serif; font-size: 13pt; line-height: 18.5467px;">When someone is in your life for a <b><span style="background: yellow;">REASON</span></b>, it is usually to meet a necessity you or they have prayed for. God often sends someone to assist us through a difficulty, to provide us with direction and support, to support us physically, emotionally, and/or spiritually. They are there only for the reason God needs them to be or vice versa. And often at times without any offense, the relationship will come to a close; sometimes we grow apart, sometimes one of us will walk away, sometimes people die, sometimes God completely removes them from our lives, sometimes they act a fool and you have to do what you have to do and take a stand. Sometimes what we fail to realize immediately from our “reasons” is that our requirements have been met, our desires have been satisfied; and now it is time to move on!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<b><i><u><span style="color: red; font-family: "high tower text" , serif; font-size: 13pt; line-height: 18.5467px;">SEASON<o:p></o:p></span></u></i></b></div>
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<b><i><u><span style="color: red; font-family: "high tower text" , serif; font-size: 13pt; line-height: 18.5467px;"><br /></span></u></i></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: "high tower text" , serif; font-size: 13pt; line-height: 18.5467px;">Sometimes we find ourselves in difficult seasons. Trust me when I say, I think this has been the most difficult season after season I have experienced but I know deep down inside something “greater” will come from it all. For those who know and believe the word of God, then you have always heard that … <i><span style="color: magenta;">It’s been said that we’re always in at least one of three seasons of life:</span><o:p></o:p></i></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "high tower text" , serif; font-size: 13pt; line-height: 18.5467px;"><i><br /></i></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "high tower text" , serif; font-size: 13pt; line-height: 18.5467px;">1.<span style="font-family: "times new roman"; font-size: 7pt; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "high tower text" , serif; font-size: 13pt; line-height: 18.5467px;">We’re in the middle of something.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "high tower text" , serif; font-size: 13pt; line-height: 18.5467px;">2.<span style="font-family: "times new roman"; font-size: 7pt; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "high tower text" , serif; font-size: 13pt; line-height: 18.5467px;">We’re about to be in something.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "high tower text" , serif; font-size: 13pt; line-height: 18.5467px;">3.<span style="font-family: "times new roman"; font-size: 7pt; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "high tower text" , serif; font-size: 13pt; line-height: 18.5467px;">We just got out of something.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "high tower text" , serif; font-size: 13pt; line-height: 18.5467px;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "high tower text" , serif; font-size: 13pt; line-height: 18.5467px;">That <i>“something”</i> is usually a difficult season in our lives. It’s never really a matter of <i>“will”</i> we have a difficult season, it’s a matter of <i>“when.”</i><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "high tower text" , serif; font-size: 13pt; line-height: 18.5467px;"><i><br /></i></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "high tower text" , serif; font-size: 13pt; line-height: 18.5467px;">When people come into our lives for a <b><span style="background: yellow;">SEASON</span></b> . . . It’s usually to help us grow, or to teach us a lesson. They may teach us something we may have never learned or have never done, had it not been for this specific season. Many will say that seasons bring eye opening understandings. They usually give you a new outlook on life.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "high tower text" , serif; font-size: 13pt; line-height: 18.5467px;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "high tower text" , serif; font-size: 13pt; line-height: 18.5467px;">Whenever you find yourself going through a tough season, remember God is not necessarily punishing you. Sometimes He must allow us to grow and learn through our poor choices in order for us to grow closer to Him. It may hurt or feel as though the pain will never stop. But remember, it’s only for a season. How long your season lasts solely depends on how long it takes us to learn!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<b><i><u><span style="color: red; font-family: "high tower text" , serif; font-size: 13pt; line-height: 18.5467px;">LIFETIME<o:p></o:p></span></u></i></b></div>
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<b><i><u><span style="color: red; font-family: "high tower text" , serif; font-size: 13pt; line-height: 18.5467px;"><br /></span></u></i></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: "high tower text" , serif; font-size: 13pt; line-height: 18.5467px;">It’s been said that <b><span style="background: yellow;">LIFETIME</span></b><i> </i>relationships teach us the most valuable thing of all times … lifetime lessons! They are often considered a gift from God so we must learn to cherish them. These are the relationships that we are blessed to have until one of you take your last breath. (Family, friends, your spouse. etc.) Don’t get me wrong they aren’t always going to be easy. All relationships take effort on both parts. Someday's you will probably feel like the relationship is not worth the effort that you put forth. Other days you will feel thankful that God has placed them in your life, wonder why He took so long, and hope that they will be around forever. It is said that love is blind, but friendship is clairvoyant. So, think about all the people who have entered, exited, been booted, God removed, passed away, or just disappeared over the years … Whether they were there for a reason, a season or a lifetime, accept them and treasure them for however long they were meant to be part of your journey. Or as Dr. Seuss once wrote: “Don’t cry because it’s over. Smile because it happened.”</span></div>
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<img alt="Image result for reason season lifetime" height="396" src="https://i2.wp.com/sunnydawnjohnston.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/02/reason-season-lifetime-1.jpg?fit=504%2C500&ssl=1" width="400" /></div>
Nyehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16050097056737271050noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3871346540371997311.post-54522013688217992492020-01-08T11:39:00.001-05:002020-01-08T11:39:05.242-05:00NEW YEAR ... DO YOU !!! <br />
<br />
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<a href="https://www.blogger.com/null" name="10882295"><b><span style="font-family: "Californian FB",serif;">New Year New Me</span></b></a><span style="mso-bookmark: 10882295;"></span><span style="font-family: "Californian FB",serif;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Californian FB",serif;">A phrase said by people who
don't <b>realize</b> that change happens when you make or <b>someone
else</b> makes it <b>happen</b>, not when time passes.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<img alt="Image result for do you" height="200" src="https://cdn.shopify.com/s/files/1/2503/0024/products/BeYouDoYouPinkSolo.jpg?v=1543800969" width="200" /></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Californian FB",serif;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Californian FB",serif;">This year
is going to be the one when you put your own needs first, when you honor where you
are no matter what, and when you identify the importance of self-awareness and what
love looks like from the inside out. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Californian FB",serif;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Californian FB",serif;">I promise
you that one thing I started to learn more and more every day is that nobody owes
you shit. NOBODY. You owe yourself any and everything that you feel you truly deserve.
For many years I downplayed myself. Downplayed my talents, my skills, and everything
that was within me so that I wouldn’t outshine a coworker, friend, family
member etc. In 2017 my brother was murdered and even though he had his troubles
in the past, what I always knew was that he was my biggest supporter in
anything I wanted to do. I could tell him I want to jump off the bridge and he
would ask me if I have a game plan executed so it’s done properly. (bad analogy
I know right) But to be honest, I remember when I got into fitness and thought
it would be a hobby and it wouldn’t become nothing. My brother would always
tell me it would become whatever you want it to become and he became the reason
why I studied for certification to become a Certified Personal Trainer. My brother
was great at everything!!! <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I felt it was
nothing he couldn’t do. He could build playgrounds, put a power wheel together
in 20 minutes, and draw his ass off. When he was locked up, I would send him
books to fuel his mind so that the walls wouldn’t consume his mind, and in
return he would send me books that I would never read. Losing him put a void in
my heart but it also reignited a lot of talents that I dumbed down for years.
Talents that he fueled, and I didn’t. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Sometimes
we deny ourselves our own happiness and it sounds crazy but it’s true. By dimming
our lights for fear of how others may feel. By dimming our lights in fear of
being greater than someone else. Or just by dimming our lights for fear of how
bright we will shine. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Californian FB",serif;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Californian FB",serif;">In 2020 … don’t dim yourself anymore, don’t downplay
yourself, don’t be less than, don’t be afraid to shine! We all would love for
people to love us and celebrate us in every single way, and many won’t. But as
a friend, all we ask is that you are supportive and what I have learned is that
not everyone will support and love you like you love them. <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">I love and support mine hard, and
everyone doesn’t have to see or understand your vision but just be encouraging.<o:p></o:p></i></b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Californian FB",serif;"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><br /></i></b></span></div>
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<img alt="Image result for do you" height="177" src="https://cdn.shopify.com/s/files/1/0018/5660/2170/articles/work-on-you_2048x.jpg?v=1554658268" width="320" /></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Californian FB",serif;"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><br /></i></b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Californian FB",serif;">So, no <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">New Year, New Me</b> …. Because resolution sounds
strong, finite, and intimidating and often we fear those things … <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="color: red;">so to 2020 New
Year, DO YOU </span></b>and with pure intentions! To be able to keep a
resolution, you also need to let it go … let go of any obstructive energy you
might feel, such as frustration, pressure, or expectation. When satisfying a
New Year’s commitment, all you can do is keep moving forward and put in the
necessary time and effort. Even if you feel like you’re not achieving enough or
going fast enough, do as Fredheim says and <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="background: yellow; mso-highlight: yellow;">“trust the process.”</span></b> <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Californian FB",serif;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Californian FB",serif;">2020 is
going to be all about setting ourselves up for emotional, mental, spiritual,
and physical success. In order to do such greatness … <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I'll share some ideas for a great 2020 💜💛💙<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<b><span style="color: #ff3399; font-family: "Californian FB",serif;">Make self-care a
priority.<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Californian FB",serif;">Self-care
isn’t just one thing, IT IS EVERYTHING … and it’s not the same thing to everyone.
Self-care means taking time to focus on things that contribute to your
well being. Self-care can be taking a bath, going to the doctor or therapy,
scheduling thirty minutes for yourself to read at night, or simply saying NO!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<b><span style="color: #2e75b6; font-family: "Californian FB",serif; mso-style-textfill-fill-alpha: 100.0%; mso-style-textfill-fill-color: #2E75B6; mso-style-textfill-fill-colortransforms: lumm=75000; mso-style-textfill-fill-themecolor: accent5; mso-themecolor: accent5; mso-themeshade: 191;">Breathe.<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Californian FB",serif;">When you
feel yourself getting worried or anxious, try taking a long inhale in through
your nose, and out through your mouth. Even taking a few deep breaths
throughout your day can help you relax and find more presence and
peace, especially in tough situations.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Californian FB",serif;"><br /></span></div>
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<b><span style="color: #ed7d31; font-family: "Californian FB",serif; mso-themecolor: accent2;">Practice
gratitude.<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Californian FB",serif;">Gratitude is the attitude!</span></b><span style="font-family: "Californian FB",serif;"> There’s always something to be
grateful for — waking up, a house (even if it is not a home YET), a job, the
sunshine, fresh air (even if it’s snowing, raining or gloomy), friends, family.
Instead of counting all the things that go wrong, count all the way things go
right and watch things transform. Difficulties turn into opportunities and
abundance becomes the name of the game. By focusing on what we have, we get
more of that back from the universe!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<img alt="Image result for gratitude meme" height="320" src="https://pics.me.me/it-is-not-the-joy-that-makes-us-grateful-it-36822989.png" width="251" /><span style="font-family: "Californian FB",serif;"><o:p> </o:p></span></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: "Californian FB",serif;"><br />
<span style="color: red;">Record the good, the bad, and the ugly.</span><o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Californian FB",serif;">One thing I
have learned? The importance of writing things down. Writing things down feels
good and it can help us get things out of our head so we can see the world from
a clearer perspective. A journal can change your life. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Californian FB",serif;"><br /></span></div>
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<b><span style="color: #ffc000; font-family: "Californian FB",serif;">Utilize mantras.<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Californian FB",serif;">If you’re
looking to fill your life with some more positivity, or just a reminder of how DOPE
you are, you can try using mantras. Try making up your own mantras based on
what you need at the moment. You can write these on paper and tape them on your
mirror, then speak them to yourself each day. Repeat your mantra to yourself at
least three times, or whenever you need a reminder of how FCKN DOPE you are.
Switch them up and see what resonates and works best for you. <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">My mantra for 2020 so far is …. <o:p></o:p></b></span></div>
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<img alt="Image result for i deserve meme" height="311" src="https://i.imgflip.com/10esfo.jpg" width="400" /></div>
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<br /></div>
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<b><span style="color: #00b0f0; font-family: "Californian FB",serif;">Surround yourself with
things that make you happy.<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Californian FB",serif;">If it
doesn’t serve you, let it go. Repeat after me and then repeat it again:<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i><span style="background: yellow; font-family: "Californian FB",serif; mso-highlight: yellow;">If it doesn’t serve you, let it go.</span></i></b><i><span style="font-family: "Californian FB",serif;"><o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i><span style="background: yellow; font-family: "Californian FB",serif; mso-highlight: yellow;"><br /></span></i></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Californian FB",serif; mso-bidi-font-style: italic;">Whatever it may be: <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">FRIENDS,
FAMILY MEMBERS, BOYFRIEND/GIRLFRIEND, HUSBAND/WIFE, THE JOB YOU HATE, THE
CLOTHES THAT DON’T FIT BUT YOU STILL SQUEEZE INTO <span style="color: red;">….
DAMN IT LET IT GO</span>!!!!</b> Life is too short and way too uncertain to
spend it surrounded by things that drain you. Surrounding yourself with people
who fulfill you and not deplete you is vital.<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><o:p></o:p></b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Californian FB",serif; mso-bidi-font-style: italic;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Californian FB",serif;">2020 is
going to be all about setting ourselves up for emotional, mental, spiritual,
and physical success!!! Last but not least don’t forget to <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: #00b050;">Be
Kind to Yourself </span><3 </i></b>… So, speak (and think) kindly to
yourself and care for your body and environment.</span></div>
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<br />Nyehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16050097056737271050noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3871346540371997311.post-67067510588774982922019-12-17T18:47:00.000-05:002019-12-17T18:47:27.848-05:00New Year ... New Views !!! Cheers to 2020 <div style="text-align: center;">
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙒𝙝𝙚𝙣</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙩𝙝𝙞𝙣𝙜𝙨</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙖𝙧𝙚</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙧𝙚𝙢𝙤𝙫𝙚𝙙</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙛𝙧𝙤𝙢</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙮𝙤𝙪𝙧</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙡𝙞𝙛𝙚</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">, </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙮</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙜𝙞𝙫𝙚</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙮𝙤𝙪</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙖𝙣</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙤𝙥𝙥𝙤𝙧𝙩𝙪𝙣𝙞𝙩𝙮</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙩𝙤</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙨𝙚𝙚</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙮𝙤𝙪𝙧𝙨𝙚𝙡𝙛</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">. 2019 <span style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="color: red;">MAAAAY</span></span> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙝𝙖𝙫𝙚</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙗𝙚𝙚𝙣</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙖</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙧𝙤𝙪𝙜𝙝</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙮𝙚𝙖𝙧</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙛𝙤𝙧</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙢𝙖𝙣𝙮</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙤𝙛</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙪𝙨</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙖𝙣𝙙</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙜𝙧𝙖𝙣𝙩𝙚𝙙</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙩𝙝𝙚</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙮𝙚𝙖𝙧</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙞𝙨𝙣</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">’</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙩</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙤𝙫𝙚𝙧</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙮𝙚𝙩</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙬𝙚</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙝𝙖𝙫𝙚</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙢𝙖𝙙𝙚</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙞𝙩</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">. </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙁𝙤𝙧</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙩𝙝𝙚</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙢𝙤𝙨𝙩</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙥𝙖𝙧𝙩</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙬𝙚</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙝𝙖𝙫𝙚</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙢𝙖𝙙𝙚</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙞𝙩</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">. </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">P𝙚𝙧𝙨𝙤𝙣𝙖𝙡</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙙𝙞𝙨𝙖𝙨𝙩𝙚𝙧𝙨;</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙡𝙞𝙠𝙚</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙗𝙧𝙚𝙖𝙠𝙪𝙥𝙨</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">, </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙟𝙤𝙗</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙡𝙤𝙨𝙨𝙚𝙨</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">, </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙖𝙣𝙙</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙩𝙝𝙚</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙙𝙚𝙖𝙩𝙝</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙤𝙛</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙡𝙤𝙫𝙚𝙙</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙤𝙣𝙚𝙨</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">; </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙩𝙝𝙖𝙩</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙩𝙚𝙣𝙙</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙩𝙤</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙖𝙙𝙙</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙛𝙪𝙚𝙡</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙩𝙤</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙖</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙣𝙤𝙩</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">-</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙜𝙧𝙚𝙖𝙩</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> 12 </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙢𝙤𝙣𝙩𝙝𝙨</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">. </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝘽𝙪𝙩</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙗𝙚𝙛𝙤𝙧𝙚</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> 2019 </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙚𝙣𝙙𝙨</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙧𝙚</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙖𝙧𝙚</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙢𝙤𝙧𝙚</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙩𝙤𝙭𝙞𝙘</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙩𝙝𝙞𝙣𝙜𝙨</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙩𝙤</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙧𝙚𝙢𝙤𝙫𝙚</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙛𝙧𝙤𝙢</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙮𝙤𝙪𝙧</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙡𝙞𝙛𝙚</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">. </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">L𝙞𝙠𝙚</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙨𝙤𝙘𝙞𝙖𝙡</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙢𝙚𝙙𝙞𝙖</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">, </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙗𝙖𝙙</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙛𝙧𝙞𝙚𝙣𝙙𝙨</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">, </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">single-minded</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙧𝙤𝙢𝙖𝙣𝙩𝙞𝙘</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙥𝙖𝙧𝙩𝙣𝙚𝙧𝙨</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">, </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙖𝙣𝙙</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙪𝙣𝙖𝙫𝙖𝙞𝙡𝙖𝙗𝙡𝙚</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙘𝙧𝙪𝙨𝙝𝙚𝙨</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">/</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙛𝙧𝙞𝙚𝙣𝙙𝙨</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">/</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙛𝙖𝙢𝙞𝙡𝙮</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙚𝙩𝙘</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">. </span><span style="color: red; font-size: 12pt;">L𝙚𝙩</span><span style="color: red; font-size: 12.0pt;">’</span><span style="color: red; font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙨</span><span style="color: red; font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="color: red; font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙢𝙖𝙠𝙚</span><span style="color: red; font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="color: red; font-size: 12pt;">𝙧𝙤𝙤𝙢</span><span style="color: red; font-size: 12pt;"> </span><span style="color: red; font-size: 12pt;">𝙣𝙤𝙬</span><span style="color: red; font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙛𝙤𝙧</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙖𝙡𝙡</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙩𝙝𝙚</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙚𝙭𝙘𝙞𝙩𝙞𝙣𝙜</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙣𝙚𝙬</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙩𝙝𝙞𝙣𝙜𝙨</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙝𝙚𝙖𝙙𝙚𝙙</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙤𝙪𝙧</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙬𝙖𝙮</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙞𝙣</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> 2020. </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙏𝙝𝙞𝙣𝙜𝙨</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙨𝙪𝙘𝙝</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙖𝙨</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙡𝙤𝙫𝙚</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">, </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙣𝙚𝙬</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙡𝙞𝙛𝙚</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">, </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙣𝙚𝙬</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙛𝙧𝙞𝙚𝙣𝙙𝙨𝙝𝙞𝙥𝙨</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">, </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙗𝙪𝙨𝙞𝙣𝙚𝙨𝙨</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙫𝙚𝙣𝙩𝙪𝙧𝙚𝙨</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">, </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙟𝙤𝙗</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙤𝙥𝙥𝙤𝙧𝙩𝙪𝙣𝙞𝙩𝙞𝙚𝙨</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">, </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙙𝙞𝙛𝙛𝙚𝙧𝙚𝙣𝙩</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙨𝙤𝙘𝙞𝙖𝙡</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙘𝙞𝙧𝙘𝙡𝙚𝙨</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">, </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙚𝙩𝙘</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">. <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="color: #c00000; font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; text-align: center; text-indent: -0.25in;">As the old Marie Kondo adage goes, 'when you get rid of old clothes (and bad habits), i.e., the stuff that no longer fits right, no longer feels good, and no longer meshes with who you are today, you give yourself permission to open up space for the stuff that fits better.'</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">G𝙞𝙫𝙚</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙪𝙥</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙩𝙝𝙚</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙩𝙝𝙞𝙣𝙜𝙨</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙩𝙝𝙖𝙩</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> divert</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙮𝙤𝙪</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙛𝙧𝙤𝙢</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙮𝙤𝙪𝙧</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙜𝙤𝙖𝙡𝙨</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">. </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙄𝙣𝙨𝙩𝙚𝙖𝙙</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙤𝙛</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙖𝙙𝙙𝙞𝙣𝙜</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙢𝙤𝙧𝙚</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙩𝙝𝙞𝙣𝙜𝙨</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙩𝙤</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙮𝙤𝙪𝙧</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙡𝙞𝙛𝙚</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">, </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙩𝙧𝙮</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙧𝙚𝙢𝙤𝙫𝙞𝙣𝙜</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙨𝙤𝙢𝙚</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙣𝙚𝙜𝙖𝙩𝙞𝙫𝙚</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙩𝙝𝙞𝙣𝙜𝙨</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙩𝙝𝙖𝙩</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙝𝙤𝙡𝙙</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙮𝙤𝙪</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙗𝙖𝙘𝙠</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">. <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙍𝙚𝙢𝙤𝙫𝙚</span></i><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span></i><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙀𝙭𝙘𝙪𝙨𝙚𝙨</span></i><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;">. </span></i><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙍𝙚𝙢𝙤𝙫𝙚</span></i><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span></i><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙋𝙚𝙧𝙛𝙚𝙘𝙩𝙞𝙤𝙣𝙞𝙨𝙢</span></i><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;">. </span></i><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙍𝙚𝙢𝙤𝙫𝙚</span></i><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span></i><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙁𝙚𝙖𝙧</span></i><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;">. </span></i><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙍𝙚𝙢𝙤𝙫𝙚</span></i><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span></i><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙏𝙝𝙚</span></i><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span></i><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙉𝙚𝙚𝙙</span></i><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span></i><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙏𝙤</span></i><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span></i><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;">𝘾𝙤𝙣𝙩𝙧𝙤𝙡</span></i><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span></i><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙀𝙫𝙚𝙧𝙮𝙩𝙝𝙞𝙣𝙜</span></i><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;">. </span></i><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙍𝙚𝙢𝙤𝙫𝙚</span></i><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span></i><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;">𝘼</span></i><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span></i><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙁𝙞𝙭𝙚𝙙</span></i><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span></i><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙈𝙞𝙣𝙙𝙨𝙚𝙩</span></i><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;">. </span></i><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙍𝙚𝙢𝙤𝙫𝙚</span></i><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span></i><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙏𝙤𝙭𝙞𝙘</span></i><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span></i><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙋𝙚𝙤𝙥𝙡𝙚</span></i><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;">. </span></i><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙍𝙚𝙢𝙤𝙫𝙚</span></i><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span></i><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙏𝙝𝙚</span></i><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span></i><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙉𝙚𝙚𝙙</span></i><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span></i><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙏𝙤</span></i><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span></i><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙎𝙖𝙮</span></i><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span></i><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙔𝙚𝙨</span></i><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;"> (</span></i><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙒𝙝𝙚𝙣</span></i><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span></i><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙍𝙚𝙖𝙡𝙡𝙮</span></i><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span></i><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙔𝙤𝙪</span></i><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span></i><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙒𝙖𝙣𝙩</span></i><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span></i><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙏𝙤</span></i><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span></i><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙎𝙖𝙮</span></i><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span></i><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙉𝙤</span></i><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;">).</span></i><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝘾𝙝𝙖𝙣𝙜𝙚</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙞𝙨</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙨𝙤𝙢𝙚𝙩𝙞𝙢𝙚𝙨</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙖</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙜𝙤𝙤𝙙</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙩𝙝𝙞𝙣𝙜</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">, </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙚𝙨𝙥𝙚𝙘𝙞𝙖𝙡𝙡𝙮</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙞𝙛</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙮𝙤𝙪</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">'</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙫𝙚</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙜𝙤𝙩𝙩𝙚𝙣</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙩𝙤𝙤</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙘𝙤𝙢𝙛𝙤𝙧𝙩𝙖𝙗𝙡𝙚</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙖𝙣𝙙</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙨𝙩𝙤𝙥𝙥𝙚𝙙</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙜𝙧𝙤𝙬𝙞𝙣𝙜</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">. </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙒𝙚</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙘𝙖𝙣</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙣𝙖𝙩𝙪𝙧𝙖𝙡𝙡𝙮</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙜𝙚𝙩 self-satisfied</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙞𝙣</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙡𝙞𝙛𝙚</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">, </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙬𝙞𝙩𝙝</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙤𝙪𝙧</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙟𝙤𝙗𝙨</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">, </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙖𝙘𝙩𝙞𝙫𝙞𝙩𝙞𝙚𝙨</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">, </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙛𝙧𝙞𝙚𝙣𝙙𝙨𝙝𝙞𝙥𝙨</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙖𝙣𝙙</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙖𝙩𝙩𝙞𝙩𝙪𝙙𝙚𝙨</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">. </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝘿𝙤𝙣</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙩</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙨𝙚𝙩𝙩𝙡𝙚</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙛𝙤𝙧</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙖</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> so-so </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙡𝙞𝙛𝙚</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">, </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙩𝙝𝙞𝙨</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙞𝙨</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙩𝙝𝙚</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙤𝙣𝙡𝙮</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙤𝙣𝙚</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙮𝙤𝙪’𝙫𝙚</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙜𝙤𝙩</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">. <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;">2 </span><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙩𝙝𝙞𝙣𝙜𝙨</span><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙄</span><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;">’</span><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙫𝙚</span><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙡𝙚𝙖𝙧𝙣𝙚𝙙</span><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙞𝙣</span><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙡𝙞𝙛𝙚</span><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙖𝙗𝙤𝙪𝙩</span><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙥𝙚𝙤𝙥𝙡𝙚</span><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;"> …<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;">1) </span><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙨𝙤𝙢𝙚𝙤𝙣𝙚’𝙨</span><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙥𝙧𝙚𝙨𝙚𝙣𝙘𝙚</span><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;">, </span><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙩𝙝𝙚</span><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙧𝙞𝙜𝙝𝙩</span><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙨𝙤𝙢𝙚𝙤𝙣𝙚</span><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙘𝙖𝙣</span><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙘𝙧𝙚𝙖𝙩𝙚</span><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙛𝙚𝙚𝙡𝙞𝙣𝙜𝙨</span><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙤𝙛</span><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙟𝙤𝙮</span><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙖𝙣𝙙</span><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙧𝙚𝙡𝙞𝙚𝙛</span><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;">.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;">2) </span><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙩𝙝𝙚</span><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙥𝙧𝙚𝙨𝙚𝙣𝙘𝙚</span><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙤𝙛</span><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙩𝙝𝙚</span><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙬𝙧𝙤𝙣𝙜</span><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙥𝙚𝙧𝙨𝙤𝙣</span><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙘𝙖𝙣</span><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙘𝙧𝙚𝙖𝙩𝙚</span><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙖</span><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙨𝙤𝙧𝙩</span><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙤𝙛</span><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙚𝙢𝙤𝙩𝙞𝙤𝙣𝙖𝙡</span><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙘𝙤𝙣𝙛𝙡𝙞𝙘𝙩</span><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙩𝙝𝙖𝙩</span><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙘𝙖𝙣</span><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙙𝙖𝙢𝙖𝙜𝙚</span><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙩𝙝𝙚</span><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙨𝙤𝙪𝙡</span><span style="color: #c00000; font-size: 12.0pt;">.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">M𝙖𝙠𝙚</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙩𝙝𝙚</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙥𝙧𝙤𝙥𝙚𝙧</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙙𝙚𝙘𝙞𝙨𝙞𝙤𝙣𝙨</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙩𝙤</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙥𝙪𝙩</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙮𝙤𝙪𝙧𝙨𝙚𝙡𝙛</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙘𝙡𝙤𝙨𝙚𝙧</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙩𝙤</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙩𝙝𝙚</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙥𝙚𝙖𝙘𝙚</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙖𝙣𝙙</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙟𝙤𝙮</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙩𝙝𝙖𝙩</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙮𝙤𝙪</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙙𝙚𝙨𝙚𝙧𝙫𝙚</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙙𝙪𝙧𝙞𝙣𝙜</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙮𝙤𝙪𝙧</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙩𝙞𝙢𝙚</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙝𝙚𝙧𝙚</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙤𝙣</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙚𝙖𝙧𝙩𝙝</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">. </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">S𝙤𝙢𝙚𝙩𝙞𝙢𝙚𝙨</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙖</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙡𝙤𝙨𝙨</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙞𝙨</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙖</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙜𝙖𝙞𝙣</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">. </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">S𝙤𝙢𝙚𝙩𝙞𝙢𝙚𝙨</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙮𝙤𝙪</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙝𝙖𝙫𝙚</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙩𝙤</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙡𝙤𝙨𝙚</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙩𝙝𝙞𝙣𝙜𝙨</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙩𝙤</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙜𝙖𝙞𝙣</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙢𝙤𝙧𝙚</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙖𝙣𝙙</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙨𝙤𝙢𝙚𝙩𝙞𝙢𝙚𝙨</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙩𝙝𝙚</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙩𝙝𝙞𝙣𝙜𝙨</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙮𝙤𝙪</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙩𝙝𝙤𝙪𝙜𝙝𝙩</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙮𝙤𝙪</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙡𝙤𝙨𝙩</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙬𝙚𝙧𝙚𝙣</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">’</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙩</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙡𝙤𝙨𝙨𝙚𝙨</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙖𝙩</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙖𝙡𝙡</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">. </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">B𝙚𝙞𝙣𝙜</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙬𝙞𝙩𝙝</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙩𝙝𝙚</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙧𝙞𝙜𝙝𝙩</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙥𝙚𝙧𝙨𝙤𝙣</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">, </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙨𝙪𝙧𝙧𝙤𝙪𝙣𝙙𝙚𝙙</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙗𝙮</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙩𝙝𝙚</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙧𝙞𝙜𝙝𝙩</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙥𝙚𝙤𝙥𝙡𝙚</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙞𝙨</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙨𝙤𝙢𝙚𝙩𝙝𝙞𝙣𝙜</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙩𝙝𝙖𝙩</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">I’𝙫𝙚</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙨𝙩𝙧𝙞𝙫𝙚𝙙</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙛𝙤𝙧</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙗𝙪𝙩</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙞𝙣</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙩𝙝𝙚</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙚𝙣𝙙</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">, </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙧𝙚</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">’</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙨</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙣𝙤𝙩𝙝𝙞𝙣𝙜</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙬𝙧𝙤𝙣𝙜</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙬𝙞𝙩𝙝</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙗𝙚𝙞𝙣𝙜</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙖𝙡𝙤𝙣𝙚</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙞𝙛</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙞𝙩</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙢𝙚𝙖𝙣𝙨</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙗𝙚𝙞𝙣𝙜</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙘𝙡𝙤𝙨𝙚𝙧</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙩𝙤</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙝𝙖𝙥𝙥𝙞𝙣𝙚𝙨𝙨</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">. </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙄</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙥𝙧𝙖𝙮</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙖𝙣𝙙</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙝𝙤𝙥𝙚</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙩𝙝𝙤𝙨𝙚</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙬𝙝𝙤</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙣𝙚𝙚𝙙</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙩𝙤</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙖𝙧𝙚</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙖𝙗𝙡𝙚</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙩𝙤</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙛𝙞𝙣𝙙</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙩𝙝𝙚</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙨𝙩𝙧𝙚𝙣𝙜𝙩𝙝</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙩𝙤</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙡𝙚𝙩</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙜𝙤</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙤𝙛</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙖𝙡𝙡</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙩𝙝𝙚</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙩𝙝𝙞𝙣𝙜𝙨</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙩𝙝𝙖𝙩</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙣𝙤</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙡𝙤𝙣𝙜𝙚𝙧</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙨𝙚𝙧𝙫𝙚</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙖</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙥𝙤𝙨𝙞𝙩𝙞𝙫𝙚</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙥𝙪𝙧𝙥𝙤𝙨𝙚</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙞𝙣</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙞𝙧</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">𝙡𝙞𝙛𝙚</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">.</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif; font-size: 12.0pt;">🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; line-height: normal; margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: right;">
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; line-height: normal; margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">The
truth is, everyone is going to hurt you. You just got to find the ones worth
suffering for. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">-Bob Marley </span>💚💙💛💜💓💙💚💛💜</span></div>
<div align="right" class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in; text-align: right;">
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="color: #002060; font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif; mso-bidi-font-family: "Cambria Math"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"></span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">🦄 𝐿𝑜𝓋𝑒 𝒾𝓈 𝐿𝑜𝓋𝑒 ... 𝑒𝓋𝑒𝓃 𝒾𝒻 𝒾𝓉 𝒾𝓈 𝒻𝓇𝑜𝓂 𝒶 𝒹𝒾𝓈𝓉𝒶𝓃𝒸𝑒. 🦄</span></div>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"></span></span><br />
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="color: #c00000; font-family: "cambria math" , serif; mso-bidi-font-family: "Cambria Math"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">𝐻𝑒𝓇𝑒</span><span style="color: #c00000; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">’</span><span style="color: #c00000; font-family: "cambria math" , serif; mso-bidi-font-family: "Cambria Math"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">𝓈</span><span style="color: #c00000; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"> </span><span style="color: #c00000; font-family: "cambria math" , serif; mso-bidi-font-family: "Cambria Math"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">𝓉𝑜</span><span style="color: #c00000; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">
2020 🌟🌻🌻</span></span></span></div>
<span style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">
</span></span>
<br />Nyehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16050097056737271050noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3871346540371997311.post-22084734985534079062019-12-03T20:01:00.003-05:002019-12-03T20:01:42.613-05:00Everyone Doesn't Deserve You !!!<div style="text-align: justify;">
<div class="MsoNormal">
Of all the people we will date in life, finding someone who
truly deserves you will be like looking for a needle in a haystack. There will
be individuals who’ll measure up in many ways but finding someone who really
has your best interest at heart and is a balance with you in all the ways that
matter isn’t always easy. Because of this, every now and then we tend to
hang on longer than we should when it’s just not right! Every now and then the
person you’re dating doesn’t deserve you. Wait .... what did she say? <span style="font-family: "Segoe UI Emoji",sans-serif; mso-bidi-font-family: "Segoe UI Emoji";">🤨</span>
Yes chiiiilllle’ read it again .... <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><u>sometimes
the person you’re dating DOES NOT DESERVE YOU‼️</u></b><br />
<br />
Have you ever met someone with a flawless relationship? Trust and believe it’s
a lot of hurt behind closed doors, but so often we get caught up that we miss
the signs. A partner is supposed to support you, so your doubts are limited.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<b><u><span style="background: yellow;">SUPPORT:</span> </u> </b>bear all or part of the weight of; hold up. a thing (partner) that bears the weight of something (partner) or keeps it upright. to hold up or serve as a foundation. to keep from fainting, yielding, or losing courage: <b>COMFORT</b></div>
<br />
Now if you find yourself in a connection in which you are often wondering what
the hell you’re doing with your life, then dear that is NOT a good sign. A
relationship is supposed to be about finding your equal. If your companion
makes you feel like you don’t measure up to their expectations, or if you don’t
feel like you’re on the same page than .... <span style="font-family: "Segoe UI Emoji",sans-serif; mso-bidi-font-family: "Segoe UI Emoji";">🛑</span> that my friends is
another red flag. You may have accomplished more than your partner or vice
versa, you may have your shit together and they could be working on getting
their shit together ... regardless of the nature of your differences it should
be respected, valued, appreciated and all the above. If someone doesn’t respect
your dreams, understand your grind, and/or push you to be a better you than you
were the day before then they don’t respect you either. Self-absorption is factual.
Self-absorption can lead to a controlling relationship. A relationship should
NEVER be about one individual ... but always recognize who’s needs get the most
attention!<br />
<br />
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Everyone
doesn’t deserve you!!!</i></b> How do they make you feel? It’s one thing if
you’re equal in position to their family and close friends, but you shouldn’t
be second. No one should ever feel that they’re not of importance to their
partner. If there’s a big imbalance in how much they give and how much you
give, it simply means they’re not invested as much as you. You want someone
who’s giving it their all and not being just half-assed about you or your
relationship. Just remember how perfectly fine you were doing before them and
how perfectly fine you will do after they are gone. You can't be with someone
like this—someone who makes you feel unhappy, depressed, confused, and wounded.<br />
<br /><div style="text-align: center;">
<b><span style="color: red;">** DO NOT LOSE
YOURSELF **</span></b></div>
It’s normal to change a bit in a relationship, as a means to adjust, but you
should never lose yourself completely. <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: red;">Sometimes we miss the signs of change and look at it as
“evolving!”</span></i><br />
<br /><div style="text-align: center;">
<b><span style="background: yellow; mso-highlight: yellow;">EVOLVE</span></b>: to produce by natural processes</div>
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><div style="text-align: center;">
<i>Keyword: NATURAL ... not because or for
someone else.</i></div>
<o:p></o:p></i><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><br /></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Don’t allow that breakdown to happen. Don’t let your companion
break you! It’s in that breaking point that insecurities arise and your
self-worth plunges. That is not the sign of a healthy relationship. People who
make those they claim to love feel inferior are dealing with their own problems
and hang-ups. You’re better than that. To quote Eleanor Roosevelt, <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: red;">“No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.”</span></i></b>
Don’t give them that permission. It’s sad how someone can go from being the
reason you wake up smiling ... to the reason you cry yourself to sleep at
night! Just remember how perfectly fine you were doing before them and how
perfectly fine you will do after them. Your life doesn't depend on them ...if
you're giving your all to someone and they can't even appreciate it, then what
are you doing? You give your heart to people who don’t deserve it because your uncertainty of self.
You think, maybe I’m asking for too much, or being unreasonable, but you
shouldn’t have to guard your wants and needs, and the right person would
definitely be willing to meet them. Your feelings aren’t unreasonable and
wanting the love you know that you deserve isn’t either.<o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="color: #7030a0;">** EVERYONE DOESN’T DESERVE YOU ‼️‼️“</span></b><span style="color: #7030a0;"> 💜</span><span style="mso-no-proof: yes;"><!--[if gte vml 1]><v:shapetype
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Nyehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16050097056737271050noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3871346540371997311.post-19454198314180998362019-11-15T10:19:00.000-05:002019-11-15T10:19:19.772-05:00Fear of Falling in Love💋💜<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<span style="background: white; color: red; font-family: "Bodoni 72 Book"; font-size: 14.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Baoli SC Regular";">Who isn’t on some level fearful or resistant to,
not just falling in love, but also <i>living</i> in love? Many
of us, but how many will openly admit it? Here I am, experiencing the fear of
happiness, the fear of love, the fear of intimacy. With that
fear we defend ourselves, self-protect, and self-sabotage when
it comes to love or the possibility of anything good!</span><span style="font-family: "Bodoni 72 Book"; font-size: 14.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Baoli SC Regular";"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in; text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in; text-align: justify;">
<span style="background: white; font-family: "Bodoni 72 Book"; font-size: 14.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Baoli SC Regular";">Liking someone is easy. It's controllable. It doesn't hurt
you. You don't have to force it back like a tablespoon of “tussin”. It's
delicate, but in the best way. Letting ourselves fall in love means taking a
real risk. We must place ourselves in a great amount of trust in another
person, allowing them to affect us, which makes us feel unprotected and
defenseless. Our core defenses are tested. We tend to believe that
the more we care, the more we can get hurt. </span><span style="font-family: "Bodoni 72 Book"; font-size: 14.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Baoli SC Regular";">We’re afraid to put ourselves out there
and be vulnerable with our emotions.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in; text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: "Bodoni 72 Book"; font-size: 14.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Baoli SC Regular";">Love
is a risk, perhaps the biggest gamble we’ll take in our lives, let telling the
dealer “hit me” when you have 17 in a game of black jack but hopeful for a 4.
We make a choice to choose to put all our trust and faith into someone who,
let’s be honest, we don’t <i>even </i>fucking know. Crazy
right?!?! Love is that indefinable feeling that we’re all searching
for. Who <i>doesn’t</i> want to fall in love? Who doesn’t want
to be uncontrollably happy with someone else? Even those of us who <i>claim</i> to
not currently be looking for a serious relationship (those is me … I am
those) <span style="background-color: white;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial;">😂</span><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial;">😂</span><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial;">😂</span></span>– we have an unspoken
contract with ourselves that would all change if the right person were to
suddenly walk or “diddy bop” into our lives; because who would turn down the
opportunity of falling in love? <span style="background: white;">Love is
completely different and way more complex, and that's my dear readers is why
it's scary. Scary like Nightmare on Elm Street scary … This blog post is for
the unprepared. Those who may have allowed the possibility of love creep up on
them. And let me reassure you this one thing; NO MATTER how ready you feel you
are, I guarantee that isn't enough. It may never be enough. And you must be OK
with that. When we engage in a relationship, we are rarely fully aware of how
we’ve been impacted by our past. The ways we were hurt in previous relationships, friendships
and even kinship's. Old, negative dynamics make us wary of opening ourselves up
to someone new. We find ourselves steering away from affection and intimacy,
because it stirs up those old feelings of hurt, loss, anger, disappointment or
rejection. <i><span style="color: red;">“When you long for something, like
love, it becomes associated with pain,”</span></i><span style="color: red;"> </span>the
pain you felt at not having it in the past or never having at all.</span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in; text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in; text-align: justify;">
<span style="background: white; font-family: "Bodoni 72 Book"; font-size: 14.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Baoli SC Regular";">What I am starting to understand is that love is about being
OK. You must learn to <b>be OK</b> with rescheduled dinners, and
families, and the possibility of forever. You must learn to <b>be OK</b> with
sometimes coming up short because you don't know enough. Many of us scuffle
with underlying feelings of being unlovable. We have an uneasy feeling of our
own value and believing that anyone could really care for us. Why would they?
We all have a “dangerous inner voice,” which acts like a red headed stepchild
inside our heads that tells us we are undeserving and unworthy
of happiness. Love means not just spending time together but also learning
and understanding the element of spending time apart and being able to continue
with life and not melting down, being honest about the silliest things and even
the things we rather not be honest about at all. That's all tough to accomplish.</span><span style="font-family: "Bodoni 72 Book"; font-size: 14.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Baoli SC Regular";"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in; text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in; text-align: justify;">
<span style="background: white; font-family: "Bodoni 72 Book"; font-size: 14.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Baoli SC Regular";">That “inner voice” can be damaging and unpleasant, but at the
same time it’s also comfortable in its familiarity. When someone sees us
differently from our voices, affectionate and appreciating us, we start to feel
uncomfortable and </span><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-color: white; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial; font-family: "Bodoni 72 Book"; font-size: 14pt;">defensive</span><span style="background: white; font-family: "Bodoni 72 Book"; font-size: 14.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Baoli SC Regular";">, because it challenges who we are. </span><b><span style="background: yellow; font-family: "Bodoni 72 Book"; font-size: 14.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Baoli SC Regular";">BREATHE!!!</span></b><span style="background: white; font-family: "Bodoni 72 Book"; font-size: 14.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Baoli SC Regular";"> 😣😖I
know it's weird. I know it’s much easier said than done, too. Truth be
told, being scared to love someone else isn't about the other person; it's
about you. You feel insignificant and confused. Tenacious views of not being
good enough plague you every waking moment and if you are like me even your
sleeping moments. But I am learning day by day that I am enough as are
you! Any time we experience true joy or feel the</span><span style="background-color: white;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial; font-family: "Bodoni 72 Book"; font-size: 14pt;"> </span><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial; font-family: "Bodoni 72 Book"; font-size: 14pt;">valuableness</span><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial; font-family: "Bodoni 72 Book"; font-size: 14pt;"> </span></span><span style="background: white; font-family: "Bodoni 72 Book"; font-size: 14.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Baoli SC Regular";">of
life on an emotional level, we can expect to feel a great amount of
unhappiness. I tend to be one of those people who will quickly shy away from
the things that would make me happiest, why. Because they also make me feel
pain. <i><span style="color: red;">The opposite is also true</span></i>. We
cannot selectively numb ourselves to unhappiness without numbing ourselves to
happiness. When it comes to falling in love, I’m hesitant to go “all in,”
for fear of the unhappiness it could stir up in me. Someone once said
to me, “You can never be anything worse than the demons in your own mind, so
free yourself of small worries and <b>breathe</b>”. The hesitation of
getting involved with someone, because that person “likes me too
much.” But one thing that love can often be is imbalanced, with one person
feeling more or less from minute to minute. Our feelings toward someone are an
ever-changing force. In a matter of seconds, we can experience anger,
irritation or even hate for a person we love. Worrying over how we will feel
keeps us from seeing where our feelings would indeed go. <span style="color: #222222;">“Worry never robs tomorrow of its sorrow, it only
saps today of its joy.” ...</span></span><span style="font-family: "Bodoni 72 Book"; font-size: 14.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Baoli SC Regular";"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in; text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in; text-align: justify;">
<span style="background: white; font-family: "Bodoni 72 Book"; font-size: 14.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Baoli SC Regular";">I rationalize to myself a million reasons I shouldn’t be in a
relationship. Nevertheless, the reasons I give often have doable solutions, and
what’s really driving me is the deeper fear of loss. Relationships bring up an
ambush of challenges. By getting to know ourselves, we give ourselves the
best chance of finding and maintaining long-lasting love. </span><span style="font-family: "Bodoni 72 Book"; font-size: 14pt;">Here’s
the deal: <b>when it comes to relationships, the only thing we can be
certain of is uncertainty. </b>We’re all a little afraid; some of us
simply choose to push through the fear, and some of us don’t. <b>Not a
single person on this planet is fearless.</b></span><span style="font-family: "Bodoni 72 Book"; font-size: 14.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Baoli SC Regular";"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in; text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: "Bodoni 72 Book"; font-size: 14pt;">I now find myself trying to be the person who isn’t holding back
their true feelings, the person who casts a shadow over her Shea Butter (raw)
emotions; because the only person I am hurting in the process is myself.
Worry about the what ifs<i>,</i> don’t worry about a future which you
eventually can’t control, and don’t worry if you are the person who seems to
always care more; because someone will always care more than the other. </span><span style="background: white; font-family: "Bodoni 72 Book"; font-size: 14.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Baoli SC Regular";">Allowing
worry or guilt over how we may or may not feel keeps us from getting
to know someone who is expressing interest in us and may prevent us from
forming a relationship that could really make us happy. Maybe even the happiest
we have ever been. </span><span style="font-family: "Bodoni 72 Book"; font-size: 14.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Baoli SC Regular";"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in; text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in; text-align: justify;">
<span style="background: white; font-family: "Bodoni 72 Book"; font-size: 14.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Baoli SC Regular";">As </span><span style="font-family: "Bodoni 72 Book"; font-size: 14.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Baoli SC Regular";">rapper<span style="background: white;"> Drake's mama
said, </span><b><span style="background: yellow;">"Who the f*** wants
to be 70 and alone?"</span></b><span style="background: white;"> Human
interaction is important, but love is essential. Stop worrying. Stop wondering.
Stop stressing. Love is hard but it is also easy. They call it falling in love
for a reason, right? But we must let ourselves go to do so without wound.</span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<!--EndFragment--><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<i><span style="background: white; color: #7030a0; font-family: "Bodoni 72 Book"; font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA; mso-fareast-font-family: "Baoli SC Regular"; mso-fareast-language: EN-US;">"Love from ourselves and other people can
help us feel like we have value. Deep down, we all want to be loved and
wanted." </span></i><span style="background-color: white; color: #7030a0; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">💖💘💋</span></div>
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Nyehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16050097056737271050noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3871346540371997311.post-23240919842296815872019-10-15T09:52:00.002-04:002019-10-15T09:52:32.374-04:00Personal Conversation ... <div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<img alt="Image result for god will give you more than you can handle" height="187" src="https://catholicmom.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/09/when-god-give-you-more-than-you-can-handle.png" width="400" /></div>
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<br />
People are often telling me, "God won't give you more than you can bear," or when someone is experiencing difficulty in their lives, we often say to them, “Don’t worry, God won’t give you any more than you can handle.” But the truth of the matter is ....<br />
<br />
<br />
<div style="text-align: center;">
<b style="background-color: yellow;"><span style="font-size: large;">Yes, God Will Give You More Than You Can Handle</span></b></div>
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I have been writing and writing in journals for so many years and when I have those random moments in which I look back through them I often read, “God, I can’t handle this anymore. I don’t know what to do ... I give up, I quit, if it's your will, why me, why can't it just be over, etc." Over the years circumstances in my life have been nothing short of overwhelming, everything crumbling, and my world literally fell apart within 365 days year after year after year for about 4 years straight and counting. Real talk, it has been so many days when people have come alongside me and tried to reassure me by saying, “God won’t give you more than you can handle,” & the first thought was to punch them in the face all while saying "are you serious? HE sees all this pain I am carrying yet I continue to endure more ... so does he think I'm built Ford tough?" 😕 When we are down and out and feeling discouraged, having a bad day, heartbroken, missing a loved one, etc; hearing those words don't mean SHIT and can cause us to feel like we aren't measuring up. It causes us to ask, “why can’t I handle it?”<br />
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Truth be told, God never told not nann (yes NOT NAAN) one of us that HE wouldn't give us more than we can handle. A few ugly truths are this:</div>
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1. There will be times in life when you will feel like you are drowning. </div>
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2. There is no one to help you.</div>
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3. IT. WILL. HURT. LIKE. HELL ❗❗❗</div>
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Suffering doesn’t ask if you’re ready. It doesn't send a text message or put a reminder on our calendars. It may come slowly or unknown and often unseen and with a vengeance, but it doesn’t ask permission, and it doesn’t care about convenience, feelings, or fucks given for that matter. There’s never a good time for your life to be shattered. Trials come in all shapes and sizes, but they don’t come to show how much we can take or how we have it all together. Mind-boggling suffering will come our way because we live in a crippled world with damaged souls (people). And when it comes, let’s be clear that by no means whatsoever that we have what it takes to handle it. God will truly give us more than we can handle—but not more than HE can! Even though the words are meant for reassurance they can often serve as discouragement. Sometimes it can even tempt us to ignore our suffering and pretend it’s not there. It can lead us to believe the lie that we can do it ourselves; that we can handle it and the truth of the matter is <span style="color: #cc0000;">WE CAN NOT!</span> We stumble so much because we fail to recognize that sometimes we can’t make it on our own.<br />
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The verse most often quoted to support this is, “No temptation has overtaken you that is not common to man. God is faithful, and he will not let you be tempted beyond your ability, but with the temptation he will also provide the way of escape, that you may be able to endure it” <b>(I Corinthians 10:13)</b> "Paul pointed out that we always have a choice: engage in sin or run from it. The promise is that God will always provide a way for us to run from it. <span style="background-color: orange;">Let’s be clear:</span> Paul was talking about temptation, not suffering."</div>
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With temptation, we have a choice, but with suffering we often don’t have a choice. A few months ago, I remember being out with some colleagues and getting a text that read " ... in ICU she's holding strong but the doctors gave a tough report today. Sorry to text you with not good news. Love you.💗" I was already in suffering mode and the actual conversation happened shortly after. For days and days, I tussled with whether to fly home or just wait for the call and be ready for the end results. Sometimes, it seems as no matter how prepared you may or may not feel, you are still never really ready! I ended up flying home and just remember driving straight to the hospital from the airport , and I just sat there and wept 😢 and thought to myself, “I’d do anything to NOT have to experience this pain again” yet “I’d do anything to NOT let Jessica experience this pain alone.” It was one of the most powerless feelings that I was experiencing for the 4th year in a row all within another 365 days. Trust and believe that I did not choose this. My family did not choose this. In moments like these we feel utterly destroyed. <br />
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“This is too much for me!” A forever kind of thought. Those same words I have written over and over in many of my journals, even still till this' very day! Even Jesus has cried out, Matthew 26:38 “My soul is overwhelmed with sorrow to the point of death.” What I am learning in this lifetime and from my past time is it’s OK to feel like we can’t handle it, like we are going to give up. We can cry out, our souls can be empty, and there will be bad days. I believe that the reality is, once we are able to come to terms with who and what we are; and become aware that life will indeed give us more than we can handle, we find an assurance (BLESSED): God is faithful to meet us in the mess and in the pain. Makes perfect sense why they always tell us "cast our fears, worries, suffering and pain on God..." But even this can seem like a stale phrase. Because when it really hurts, I mean really hurts, like stubbed your toe against the door, couch, or bed kind of HURT .... God can seem so far away. This is where good friends and good friends in FAITH come in. You will help each other to move ahead, and you will need each other far more than those stale phrases. It is without a doubt that life becomes unmanageable, and you must have someone who is willing to walk alongside you; whether to hold your hand, hold the umbrella to weather the downpour, or chase the clouds away. Learning to be there for one another in the midst of all the anguish.<br />
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When we are willing to rest in the pain of one another, to ride out with one another when life’s highway turns problematic like I-77 during a morning commute (or any time of the day at this point) or I-95S if you didn't get on the road before 7AM, and to accept one another’s burdens when they are too heavy, we personify something so much greater. While life can sometimes be too much, through the goodness of HIM we become a living and breathing testimony .... many of us become a<br />
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<i><span style="color: cyan;"><b>Personal Conversation</b></span></i></div>
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Nyehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16050097056737271050noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3871346540371997311.post-34995838879987535952019-09-24T12:12:00.001-04:002019-09-24T12:12:16.979-04:00Single or Settle ... Settling is an ugly, depressing word. But the pressure to settle can be very real, even if it is not communicated explicitly. People who are single after a certain age are often seen as "too picky" and urged to lower their standards. We learn that our worth is tied up in our ability to find a mate; that marriage marks the passage into mature adulthood and is our most important adult relationship; and that we are not complete until we find our other half. But where the hell is this written down at, what book is this published in? And then there is the issue of our "biological clocks," I mean it's no wonder that people feel rushed to settle down before they are ready, or before they find the right match. People in bad relationships are often just as depressed and lonely as people who are single. Given the importance of social connection to our well-being, it clearly makes sense that we seek out intimate relationships, but when fear of being alone drives our romantic decisions, it can lead us to engage in poor judgment and to choose relationships that are unlikely to last, that make us depressed, or even leave us vulnerable to abuse (mentally and physically). I remember reading somewhere that ... If we take the “musical chairs” approach—“When you take a seat, any seat, just so you’re not left standing alone,” we may miss critical warning signs that a potential partner is bad news.<br />
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Being single is not always bad as it has its benefits. Being single is an opportunity to build strong friendships, devote yourself to activities and causes that you’re passionate about, and develop a sense of self-worth and identity that is not attached to another person's love and approval. All of these things truly serve us well if and when we find our self's in a relationship: if you feel satisfied in your life independent of your partner, you may be less likely to have the unrealistic expectation that your partner can and should meet all your needs, an expectation. Settling is what I like to call the safe bet, whereas holding out is a gamble. There is a reasonable chance that many of us won’t find true love. But the payoff is so much bigger. For every story you hear about someone who was too picky and ended up alone and miserable, there is another story about someone who stuck to their guns and ultimately found someone amazing who made the wait more than worth it. Would you rather meet the love of your life at age 40 and spend 50 wonderful years with them, or be stuck with someone you didn't really connect with for your entire adult life? Settling for an unhappy relationship because you’ve already invested a lot in it is like going to a concert when you're sick with the flu, or continuing to invest in a company that is doomed to fail. Loss is inevitable; it’s just a matter of whether you get out now and lose less, or stay invested and risk an even greater loss.<br />
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Now let me be clear about a few things. Accepting a person’s flaws does not mean having to settle for them. People are sometimes too perfectionist about the qualities they want in a partner and reject potentially great people for superficial reasons (like not being tall enough, he didn't have a beard, he's light skin, she didn't have a fat ass, I couldn't read her instead of getting to know her, and all that other shit we feed ourselves) that will not prove to be what matter in the long run (like kindness & CONNECTION). But when you fall in love with someone, accepting their shortcomings doesn’t feel like settling. Rather than picking apart a person’s negative and positive qualities, we should look at the big picture of who they are as a person and how we feel when we are with them. If the relationship feels right as a whole; like fresh hot biscuits from Red Lobster or ya momma's biscuit (yes ya momma's biscuits, LOL) and the important bases are covered then there is nothing that needs to be settled for. RIDE THAT SHIT THE FUCK OUT!<br />
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Relationships!!!! URGH ... It is a scary thing in today's world. At least, I think so anyways. No one never likes being called “picky.” You start to contemplate questions like, “Am I being too hard on men?” or “Is what I want unrealistic?” Entertaining the word “picky” is the gateway drug to settling. Many of us have had at least one relationship with an emotionally unavailable person who didn’t really want to commit. Then many of us have gone on multiple dates with someone, despite an absence of something, chemistry, connection — that thing that makes us excited to put down our book, our phones when together, or face inclement weather just to see someone. (YES you remember that one person who you'd drive out to see during that winter storm and risk being snowed in with!)<br />
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The truth of the matter is no one tells you what it looks like to settle. It doesn't have a face, no one knows what it looks like, some don't even know how it feels. I had a friend ask me before, “What do you think it means to settle? I mean, what is it, actually?” My answer is “It’s settling if you feel like it is.” The definition of settling isn't universal because settling is individually felt. You have to believe that what you're looking for is out there, even though you're yet to encounter it. What's heartbreaking is that today many people aren't designed to settle on connection. And what is connection, anyway? It can be described a lot of ways: attachment, support, understanding, history, etc, etc, etc. But I believe it’s feeling the endless potential for growth with a single person, someone who seems to help you become more, which might be harder to find than ever before.<br />
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You don’t owe anyone an explanation for ending a relationship or staying single. When you are single, you embrace it for what it is: AWESOME or at least that's what it's suppose to be. So then, when you begin dating, you begin looking for something else. Not saving, but something greater than what you have alone. Truth is women don’t “need” a relationship for opportunities, as they might have benefited from one in the past. Women are pursuing more, independent, financially and in spirit burning our sage, drinking our water and so much more. So don't allow someone to label you as "picky" just let them know you're "selective" SHIT you have every right to be. Again I remind you ... You don’t owe anyone an explanation for ending a relationship or staying single.<br />
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So, the next time you wonder if you’re settling, ask yourself if it feels like you are. The next time you wonder what connection really is, and if you’ve ever found it, ask yourself if you’ve felt that “click” with anyone who seemed to provide genuine opportunity for growth whether it's together or apart. I am a firm believer in love and feeling your romantic decisions deep in your core, like mind, body and soul type core, no matter what they are, and no matter who on the outside does/doesn’t understand. There is no formula, no secret. Whatever love-seeking decision you make, it’ll cost you. Just about everything in life comes with a price! You may let someone go you’re not so fond about and be alone for a long time, maybe forever. And you might stay with them and regret your decision, always wondering if you could have found someone better.Nyehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16050097056737271050noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3871346540371997311.post-53755478892310306032019-08-15T10:02:00.000-04:002019-08-15T10:02:21.992-04:00And maybe someday ... You and I. AGAIN 💕<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="background-color: white;"><b><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">“I was trying to be his wife. </span></b></span></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">Yet he couldn’t divorce the streets....” <span class="_5mfr" style="margin: 0px 1px;"><span class="_6qdm" style="background-image: url("https://static.xx.fbcdn.net/images/emoji.php/v9/fe7/1/16/1f494.png"); background-repeat: no-repeat; background-size: contain; display: inline-block; height: 16px; text-shadow: none; vertical-align: text-bottom; width: 16px;">💔</span></span></span></b></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">It’s crazy that sometimes love isn’t even enough to save a relationship. </span></b></div>
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<span style="background-color: white;"><b><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">Sometimes it lasts in love, but sometimes it hurts like hell !!!"</span></b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">Dear Summer ... if my moment didn't come right on time, yet at the most craziest time of my life, but we not know the time nor place right? OPPORTUNITY presented itself yet again. This set up was nobody but God, maybe even my mother, but regardless of who provided it, nonetheless it was there! Who said 2nd chances don't happen like we want them to? I mean there he was, still fine as ever (to me), still gave me butterflies, and did I mention still fine as ever? I felt like the girl from high school and the young woman in her early twenties all over again. But y'all know I "smized" and kept it moving. Small talk and all smiles .. I swear I still don't know what it is about him!</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: large;"><b><span style="color: purple;">But he and I reconnected ... FINALLY !</span> </b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">When we reconnected I didn't think our situation would become anything more than two old souls reconnecting and hanging out. Honestly, in my mind I didn't even care, because I knew I was more than likely leaving back to North Carolina if I decided to accept this job offer on the table and no one in the family knew that but Lisha. But here we are several months later and I find myself still wondering what we could have been. I never knew what to consider us so I refer to myself as "the one you let WALK away". I am the one you let walk away because of fear. I wish that you believed and understood the power in second chances because I think that things would have been a lot different. We could have been having 2 a.m. breakfast dates at Waffle House because those always seem to be your functioning hours. We could have been rainy Sundays spent in bed and late Friday nights passing notes on bar napkins or at the movies. We could have been weekend vacations out of town or to the beach and spontaneous flights just so you could see more of what life has to offer. We could have been so many things but instead, we are nothing.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">I wish that things had worked out differently because in my eyes I saw so much potential, but maybe I saw too much. Many will say that timing is everything when it comes to relationships, and besides friends and fears it was many things you needed to work on, but then again, so did I. Maybe one day in a few years we will run into each other again and the timing will be right; maybe third times a charm! But until then, if you are reading this just know that we could have been great. We still could be. 💕</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">If an opportunity is presented to you to be with someone you don’t want to lose and you allow fear or others to help you make the decision of whether to stay or go then rightfully so you deserve to be sad and stuck right where people leave you. But never allow the opinions of others who aren't happy and experiencing life to dictate yours ... </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">My take away and lessons of life and love have been:</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">1. Life is about risk </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">2. No one can speak on your situation with someone better than YOU ! </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">3. Change can be good, it’s all about your perspective.💜 </span></div>
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<span style="color: blue; font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: large;"><i><b>If you’re afraid to love wholeheartedly then you’ll never experience life. 🦄✨</b></i></span></div>
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Nyehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16050097056737271050noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3871346540371997311.post-64235602966249668082019-07-05T15:02:00.004-04:002019-07-05T17:12:22.991-04:00Life after Death<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">In moments when we are expectant of something we wait and then when it occurs we often feel stuck, unsure and confused. It's like our mind and body is reprocessing it all over again. That defines me in this moment. 💔 But even in the midst of all things unknown and uncertain one thing that's for sure is that God is real and in due time he will heal. The most valuable piece of information I had ever received during my time of sorrow was "don't allow anyone to dictate how you should grieve" because it may not hit you today or tomorrow; it could be 6 months from now or a year or possibly even 2 or more. Anticipatory grief is the thief that steals joy from the present. It's unshakable. Seemingly happy moments aren't so happy anymore and without warning you are swarmed with emotions. You want to spend every day living for each moment. But instead, you spend most days gripped in fear, panic, helplessness, and all the emotions in between. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">When it comes to dying, it can be unpredictable and last only a few minutes, or you can see it coming from a distance and it’ll last months or even years. It’s always hard to lose a loved one. What I can’t decide is if it’s harder to lose someone without notice or if it’s harder to watch someone fight that battle and lose every single day. Losing someone unexpectedly comes with a lot of uncertainty. </span><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">Recently, I’ve known what it’s like to watch a loved one die and unexpectedly all within a year. A year ago today my mother lost her battle to cancer – one that started only 3 months priors to her succumbing. Three months of cancer quickly killing her body. Two months of constantly feeling ill and being in pain, and toughing it out, being confined from hospital to hospital to rehab to hospice. I sat by her side day in and day out, deprived of sleep, missed meals, prayed hard, and cried a lot. We all did. We did what we could to make her comfortable. There were close calls, yet all we could do was wait. I was already at terms with what was inevitably going to happen, but still waiting to suffer. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">"The thing about dying is that it isn’t something that you can put off. It’s not something that will just go away if you quit thinking about it, and it’s certainly not something you can say, “I’ll take care of it tomorrow.” Whether you’re prepared or not, it’s going to happen, and on its own terms, too. It’s not something you can negotiate, and even when you want it to come, it still won’t listen."</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">I kept waiting to get that phone call or text message telling me that she didn’t make it through the night on the days when I was at work or the nights I didn't stay with her at the hospital. I hated seeing her struggle the way she had, yet it was hard to imagine a life without her in it. There is no chance to say, “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean those things I said" and have an actual conversation. <b><span style="color: red;">I remember telling her that if she was ready to let go, then it was okay to let go! </span>😢 </b>Crazy right? I was just so at ease with what was happening that I knew God would take care of me but it was clear that he needed her too. I had nights I was scared to fall asleep. Every time I closed my eyes, I feared I would miss her taking her last breath while I was there. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><b><span style="color: red;">July 5, 2018 .. 8:56 AM</span></b> I remember it just being the two of us in the hospital room listening to the playlist of songs I wanted played during the funeral. Smokie Norful - "I Need You Now" & every word just hitting so close to home:</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">"<b>If I never needed you before</b></span></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">To show up and restore</span></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">All of the faith that I let slip</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">While I was yet searching the world for more</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">The truest friend I have indeed</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">You are my best friend I know in me</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">I stretch my hands to thee</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">Come rescue me</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">I need you right away</span></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">The agony of being alone</span></b></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">Fear of doing things on my own</span></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">The test and trials that come to make me strong"</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">Time was winding down because they assured us you wouldn't make it through the 4th of July and you proved them wrong but I knew it was coming. About an hour later, I realized the breathing had become quieter. Her breathing became even and slower, like someone sleeping. At 9:53 AM or so, she breathed one breath and stopped. She breathed one more and then stopped again. There were no more breaths after this. I just remember hitting the call button for the nurse and saying "she's gone" and within minutes medical doctors and the hospice nurse came to confirm. Within a matter of minutes I sent out the family group text and it was over. I didn't get the "I love you" I wanted but I felt I got something much greater in the end. Her final days were filled with family members in and out of the hospital and to be alone, just the two of us in her final moments gave me peace "many who are first will be last ..." 💜 I feel honored to have gotten to be there with her until the end. I feel honored to have cared for her during her final hours. 😌</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">What you don’t realize until it happens is that even if you had weeks or months or years to prepare, it doesn’t hurt any less to lose someone you love. We are supposed to gain comfort from knowing they’re in a better place surrounded by other deceased loved ones where they aren’t feeling any pain. How selfish the human flesh can be to want those we claim to love to remain here in pain and suffering. We can have all the time in the world with people and sometimes it's never enough and sometimes we aren't given enough time for people to show us the world ... in grief, there is no stage called closure. <i><span style="color: purple;">Little by little we let go of loss BUT NEVER let go of love.</span></i> He gave me 35 years with my mother and even though many years I felt motherless, even on her death bed all I wanted her to tell me was that she loved me, and just to hug me a bit more in this lifetime, one thing I find myself doing much more is thanking God for all the lessons I learned from her. There are so many people in this world who didn't have any years together with their mother for whatever reason ... God could have given me 35 more years with her and I'd probably still be selfish when he called her home. The truth is we are never ready to let go❗❗❗</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">I read something that said "life is pleasant. Death is peaceful. It's the transition that's troublesome." Because we often look at death as the opposite of life instead of a part of it. This thing we live called life is nothing but a brief intermission between life and death. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">The reality of losing someone after watching them die is that you will still feel empty. You will still feel numb. You might even feel a sense of unfairness. Watching someone you love die is one of the hardest things you may ever do. There were times when I sat in my car and cried and thought about how hard this was. “God why her, why right after Dre?,” I’d say to myself. <i>It was harder than battling depression</i>. And at times, I honestly didn’t know how I was going to make it through. I often feel as if I was deprived a great relationship ... the mother-daughter relationship is like no other. When your mother is gone there is no secure base to return to for a mother’s support and comfort. Daughter's feel it again with every year, every change at every stage of her life. You never outgrow needing your mother in life. Even though she has transitioned, I have many moments where I feel very disconnected from life happening around me. I want to be alone and quiet and just think about what her and my brother are doing in heaven; especially on days when I feel as if I am suffering here. I want to think about them so hard with hopes to feel their presence. I want to know that I did things right by her and did not cause her to suffer any greater than the cancer and other illnesses did. I want to know that she is not scared or in pain and yet I also don’t want to worry about any of these things. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><b><span style="color: purple;">1 year later</span></b> and yet many days I find myself in that sunken place. My soul isn't quite at ease but I get up everyday; and try and make the most of everyday hoping that the day doesn't make the most of me. They always tell me, God gives his toughest battles to his strongest soldiers ... and as much as I bend, HE has never let me break. I've learned that there are battles in life that you will face alone and then there will be many that will align you to be of service to others in their time of need so they won't have to face it alone. <i><span style="color: magenta;">Pain and suffering are such horrible essential tools of growth!</span></i> "The world breaks everyone and afterward many are strong at the broken places." #thankyouGodforthesuffering #thankyouGodforthepain 💕🙏🕊 </span><br />
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Nyehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16050097056737271050noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3871346540371997311.post-21871161688742060372019-01-16T21:34:00.000-05:002019-01-16T21:34:39.807-05:00Stability .... <span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Stability ... <br />: the quality, state, or degree of being stable: such as<br />a: the strength to stand or endure : FIRMNESS<br />b: the property of a body that causes it when disturbed from a condition of equilibrium or steady motion to develop forces or moments that restore the original condition<br />c: resistance to chemical change or to physical disintegration</span><div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Every year something changes .... every day something changes ... but over the past year I started to question the whole being "single ordeal". How it has changed me, how it continues to make me ask all the questions I should've been asking years ago and if I did maybe I wouldn't be single now. <br /><br />This was my first year doing a "husband vision board" and YES I know that shit may sound crazy to some of you but trust me it's something that women do. In the mist of creating my vision board I had to plan it out, because on this board you are suppose to put characteristics of what you want in your spouse, images of the kind of things you will do together, goals as a couple and so much more. This board really opened my eyes, made me think deep down inside and actually come to realization that the stability I always wanted with someone whether it's financially, mentally, does he have goals, what's his game plan in life, etc. and so on .... & then as I considered all of those things I said to myself "girl are you stable?" Like be for real with yourself! Some of us are homeowners, have great jobs, know how to save money, and all that good jazz; but even though all of that is considered stability to some "are you truly stable?" <br /><br />Truth be told money shouldn't ever be the deciding factor, in any relationship and for me personally it's NOT the absence of money; it's more so some men's lack of a plan or motivation to become financially stable. I’m a natural cheerleader by heart and if my heart is pure for you then I may even lend you money and teach you some things and root you on your quest to financial stability…but if someone isn’t motivated, how much longer should one stay in the stands cheering for them? </span><div>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br />You begin to analyze other factors, determining your compatibility, writing out your pro's and con lists ... comparing personalities and so much more. I’m currently in those whole dating in your 30's phase, and I hate it with a "thug passion". (some will get it) I know that dating new people and getting to enjoy all the exciting “firsts” that come along with new relationships is supposed to be a fun time (trust me in your 30's it's total bullshit most days), but as someone who is just tired and ready to quit, I’m often too scared to dive in, for many reasons. I just don't want to find myself draining my resources (mental, financial, love, etc) to someone and get nothing in return because I can't get this energy back after I give it away. I believe in taking care of the people you love, and being taken care of back. I believe deserving women should be treated like a ~queen~ and showered with gifts or free meals (sorry this fast got me hungry, LOL). But I do believe in teamwork, and I most DEFINITELY believe in give-and-take.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br />Again, everyday is a learning process in this thing we call life. I’m still living and learning, and developing a more stable list of non-negotiable terms moving forward in any possible relationship I decide to engage in. But what I can say is that with all the thoughts, lessons learned, lessons learned from friends and their relationships and social media 5 lessons I gathered from it all is this:<br /><br /><ul>
<li>You shouldn’t choose someone to date based on whether or not they make "good money" and if you have a definition please explain what "good money" is to you ... but you should choose someone to date based on whether or not they have goals and aspirations. How and what are they doing with their money? Some people can make all this "good money" yet are sitting in debt ... (we can save this for another blog topic)</li>
<li>It will never be your job to fix someone else’s financial mistakes. Or any other mistakes they make. You can be there to support them, and you can even help them clean up their mess if you want – but it isn’t your responsibility. NEVER EVER ... let me repeat that one just in case someone skimmed right over it .... It will never be your job to fix someone else’s financial mistakes. Or any other mistakes they make. You can be there to support them, and you can even help them clean up their mess if you want – but it isn’t your responsibility.</li>
<li>If the person you are dating makes you feel shitty about what you do for a living ... well I shouldn't have to say it but they may not be the person for you. Shit, I have friends who feel they have shitty jobs and as a friend I tell them they shouldn't stay, I offer to fix their resumes, hell I even send them job listings to help them get out!!! And if someone you are trying to "be with" can't even offer you support well ... you already know what I am going to say. PERIOD !!! </li>
<li>If you ever spend money on your partner because you think you need to in order to gain their affection/forgiveness/attention, your relationships just as unhealthy as a double stacked bacon burger with onion rings on top and bbq sauce on a toasted bun (urgh ... sorry the fast again LMAO but you got the picture right?) But let me be clear because I am not against buying my man gifts, whatsoever !!! Hell my friends get random gifts from me in the mail almost every month ... or a random cashapp$ and my note may say "lunch on me today!" but please don't ever and I mean EVER EVER EVER find yourself spending money on him left and right to try and impress him, or prove to him that him that you are worthy. (here Queen let me help adjust your crown it was slipping, but I got you!) and last but oh baby definitely not the least .... </li>
<li>If something feels wrong, it probably is. When you spend time with people who are treating you right and truly being good to you, you really realize the little red flags that you missed with the fuck boys I have been told that in good relationships, you really do feel fuckin' good. If someone is treating you right,you aren't worried about if they are cheating on you, or being dishonest with you. In a healthy relationship, you shouldn't ever feel like someone is slipping from your grip, and forcing you into overdrive and draining all your energy on trying to prove them otherwise. When someone is treating you right, your chakras are in alignment. If you don’t feel that way, it might be time to reevaluate. </li>
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Stability ... honestly, I just want a partner who is passionate about the activities he’s partaking in. Someone who is ambitious enough to chase after his list of endeavors and hell even make a list of endeavors that we can chase together. I want a partner who possess a mentality to know better than to settle for anything in life .... PERIOD .... complacency breeds mediocrity and steals all of your potential in life. It's always good to have pressure on yourself; the worst crime you could ever commit is complacency of self. <i><span style="color: red;">Reminder: "great things never came from comfort zones!!!!"</span></i></span></div>
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Nyehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16050097056737271050noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3871346540371997311.post-12248270362884112652018-12-10T15:21:00.001-05:002018-12-10T15:21:20.679-05:00New Year .... New You !!! Dear 2019 "Greater is coming....."<br />
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Often at times we kill ourselves worrying and wondering why things didn't go the way we planned, the way we wanted it to go, according to our will. But the reality is that many times God has told us that the reason why people have betrayed you, turned their backs on you, cheated on you, lied to and about you, walked away from you without reason, has absolutely nothing to do with you. It is because He has removed them from your life because they cannot go where He is planning on taking you next!!! We fail to realize that some will only hinder us in our next level of life because they have already served their purpose in our lives. Even the people whom we felt have betrayed us are apart of the plan.<br />
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At every next level of our lives, everybody can't be in the room. Let me repeat that ... at every next level of our lives, EVERYBODY can't be in the room. Some people need to watch the show from the outside looking in, some need to hear about it via word of mouth, and many may just need to catch the snippets on your social media page if they aren't blocked/deleted. When you are being aligned for something greater, you can't talk power moves around people that don't have the same hunger or intentions as you. Some may think you're bragging, some may think your being arrogant, cocky, conceited, whatever word you choose to use.<br />
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Learn to let GO and leave whoever needs to be left behind. It could be your significant other, your mother, your sister, your brother, cousin, best friend, etc. Often we fail to realize that people who refuse to grow with us simply can not go with us. We allow emotions to block goodness, because we convince ourselves that just because someone has been by our side for years and years on end that they are entitled to come along with us to each proceeding level that life has in store for us. But please let me be the first and last person to tell you this before 2018 ends ... NO ONE is entitled to anything pertaining to the life that is yours. At some point in our lives we must come to the realization to realize that everyone can't go with us to the next level and this is why:<br />
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<b><span style="color: #134f5c;">SOME PEOPLE ARE SEASONAL ....</span></b><br />
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I read a statement about seasonal people and it said "some people are like leaves on a tree ... they are only there for a season. You can't depend on them or count on them because they are weak and only there to give you shade. Like leaves ..... as soon as the wind blows or it gets cold in your life they are gone!" Everything about that hit my soul and I said WELL GOT DAMN! And let me make this clear that if you fail to believe that you have seasonal people in your life than that's because you my dear may be the SEASONAL friend. Let me be clear that it's nothing wrong with "seasonal friends" because just like the seasons of the year we give and take what's needed from them and we move right along. Just like when Summer is over and we miss the warm weather; we may miss them too but we pack up our summer clothes and get ready for Fall.<br />
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<b><span style="color: orange;">SOME PEOPLE CAN'T HANDLE WHERE YOU'RE GOING !!!</span></b><br />
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Not everyone is going to be able to handle where you are going and the sooner you allow that settle within your soul, the sooner you will stop getting all twisted and bent out of shape over people who gave you the cold shoulder, turned their backs on you and even those who walked away. The reality will always be that you're going to lose some people along the way .... just remember that's okay. It ain't for everybody!<br />
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<span style="color: magenta;"><b>SOME PEOPLE WILL ONLY REMEMBER YOU FROM YOUR PAST ..........</b></span><br />
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Oh my dear GOD !!! I remember saying this to Shameka one day sitting in the salon .... I remember having this conversation with Tuck one day too .... I mean I recall saying this pretty much all summer long and yet and still. When people hit you with the "remember when" or the "I know him/her ..." see that's where I want to stop folks at and chime in with the "you knew" because whenever many of us are on our way to other things someone will always be looking in the rear view mirror of your life. Growth is essential, so who you knew 10 years ago definitely isn't the person you see today. Honestly, who you knew in January isn't who you see today in December ... because change is inevitable and if people can't see past that rear view than it's quite obvious that they don't have a clearer view. Those who constantly remind you or others of your past, can't propel you to your future .... that's a slingshot motion with no release! Just because you grew up with people doesn't always mean you have to grow old with them. Not everyone deserves a seat at the table of your life, if people feel as if they deserve a seat to the show tell them to bring their own chair and see if they still show up! Better yet let them know it's a cover charge and then tell me how may really actually come, because that will show you how many only come around when it's beneficial or .... (FREE).<br />
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Have you felt lonely lately? Have you felt uncomfortable? GOOD that means you're being prepared for something GREAT! Many of us always scream "new year new me" but why wait until 2019 to do what you can do today? No need to even allow anyone or anything, any additional time to drain your energy or block the possible year end blessings. Please remember and NEVER forget, the Lord givETH and the Lord takETH and that ETH means continuously!!! So understand that he will always give us people and things and take them away and that's fine as long as it's HIM doing the giving and HIM doing the taking. Don't fight it either, just learn to to take the lessons, jewels, gems or whatever that season gave you and carry on. We can't keep carrying people from year to year if they provide no interest or purpose to your growth and development in life. 2019 can be everything you speak of it to be and much more, because there is so much power in the tongue ... the only thing I'm carrying over from 2018 into 2019 is funds in my checking and savings account !!!! No new year new me ... I'm walking in all of that right now ... daily!<br />
<br />Nyehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16050097056737271050noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3871346540371997311.post-69302639176172684732018-11-29T10:59:00.001-05:002018-11-29T10:59:08.608-05:00READY ... YET ... afraid to love.<div style="text-align: justify;">
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i>Being chill is so cool these days right? Love is still for suckers isn't it? Love is a risk perhaps the biggest gamble we'll take in our lives. It's like placing all your money on black not knowing if it will land on red. You just close your eyes while the wheel spins and pray. But what happens when the ball lands on red? You might curse, you may cry, you lose right? Then what? Does your life end at that moment? NO!!! Ok maybe for like two minutes but then ... You carry on ... some of you even go back next week and try your luck again. But why aren't we so reluctant to try again when it comes to love? We make a decision to choose to put all our trust and faith into someone who, let’s be honest, we don’t really know. Because how well can you ever know someone who isn’t you? Honestly speaking I don't even think I really know myself! Everyday I am "becoming" I would hope many of you are too. That's the beauty of life it's constantly changing. That's one of the misconceptions that people have when entering relationships is wanting someone to stay the same as when you first fell in love with them. But the reality is you can't, it's just unrealistic. People change. We change little by little each and every day. Ten years down the line, neither of you will be the same person you were when you first met each other. Some grow apart, some were never meant to be together, some stayed together much longer than they should have, and many stay together for all the wrong reasons that they feel are right. </i></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i>And even though I know all of this why am I afraid? Why are many of you afraid? We’re afraid to put ourselves out there and be vulnerable with our hearts. Many of you are probably scared of getting hurt for the umpteenth time, or trying so hard to protect yourself from ever experiencing that kind of heartbreak in the first place. Love often tends to be that "elusive" feeling that 99% of are searching for, I mean who doesn't want to fall in love? Wear matching corny outfits 🤣 have someone to travel with and take "bae-cations" with, always have a plus one when needed, and when your friends ask you to hang out you actually have a VALID reason to decline instead of saying yes and then just don't go! (cause I know I am not the only one who does that) Even those of us who "claim" to not currently be looking for a serious relationship, we have this kind of "unwritten agreement" that would all change if the right person were to suddenly walk into our lives and NOT just anybody because you have to understand the difference; because who would turn down the possibility of falling in love? For some reason, we just don’t have a lot of faith in the right person ever showing up. But what if it's not the falling in love part that I am afraid of ... what if it is the falling out of love part that scares the shit out of me! </i></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i>Truth be told: when it comes to relationships the only thing we can be certain of is uncertainty. And I know that sounds bat shit crazy, but I promise you if you were to think about it you'd realize it's the truth. And the truth is, we’re all a little afraid; some of us simply choose to push through the fear, and some of us don’t. I don't believe there is a single person on this Earth that is fearless. I once heard or maybe I read it somewhere that "the people who love less in this world are the ones who fail to learn how to give unconditionally." So in my new journey and wanting more love and life I said to myself that I don't want to be the person who holds back their true feelings, the person who casts a shadow over their raw emotions; because the only person I end up hurting in the process is myself. Trying not to worry about the what ifs, trying not to worry about a future which I ultimately can’t control, and hopefully I won't worry if I am the person who seems to always care more. </i></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i>So if you are me and I am you then take note: </i></span></div>
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<li><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i>Don’t be the person who holds back their true feelings, the person who casts a shadow over their raw emotions; because the only person you’re hurting in the process is yourself. </i></span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i>Don’t worry about the what ifs, don’t worry about a future which you ultimately can’t control, and don’t worry if you are the person who seems to always care more. </i></span></li>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i>We can't change who are we are because of fear of getting hurt or being disappointed. They often say that when a person hurts you it speaks far more about their character than it does about yours. So if we happen to find ourselves at the end of a seemingly ‘failed’ relationship (hell some of you may be there now), take a step back (some of you may need to take about five or six) and ask yourself, ‘did I love them with everything I had?’ That's the only question that matters and if the answer is yes, then you absolutely DID NOT fail ... you did everything right. You came in with an open mind, you laid your heart on the table, and you bared your soul in its entirety. The process just begins all over again, it's like placing all your money on black and it ends up on red. Pissed right? ... but you walked away, recouped the monies and found yourself back at the roulette table trying your luck all over again huh? Well it's the same thing with love ... walk away, recoup (girls/guys trip, bottle of wine - maybe two, a new hobby, something short lived though), then find yourself right back out there again ... the right person will, without hesitation, do the same for you. </i></span><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">💜</span><br />
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</span>Nyehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16050097056737271050noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3871346540371997311.post-28889952131870043252018-11-22T15:41:00.000-05:002018-11-22T18:48:20.958-05:00Thanksgiving Message<br />
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<span style="color: #674ea7; font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="background-color: white;">For many this is the most awaited holiday that couldn’t come fast enough and for others it’s a day that can’t come and GO fast enough. Everyone’s understanding, values and beliefs of Thanksgiving are different and how we choose to celebrate it. To many if not all, Thanksgiving is considered a day where many of us are setting aside time to give thanks for one's blessings, our gratitude in life, along with holding feasts to celebrate a harvest or in many families just holding a feast and preparing to watch that drunk cousin, uncle and/or aunt (heck maybe ya mama) act a fool 🤣🤣 </span><span style="background-color: white;">and don’t act like we all don’t have one. </span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white;"><span style="color: #674ea7; font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">But for many this is just another day. It’s just the fourth Thursday in November. Even though Thanksgiving brings many families together on this ONE day often we miss the true message of the word “thanksgiving”. It’s been said and written that celebrating "thanksgivings"—days of prayer was thanking God for blessings such as military victory or the end of a drought. Being thankful isn't just for the Thanksgiving holiday. Scripture tells us to be "thankful in everything, in all circumstances" (1 Thessalonians 5:18). When we find ourselves overwhelmed with burdens and worried about tomorrow, we can praise God for who he is and his promise to never leave us or forsake us. We have been blessed with the free gift of salvation and eternal life! So on today, while many of you sit with your loved ones (or even the ones you don’t love but sit with them on today 🤷😖) I want you to take heed of the message and understanding of Thanksgiving. For today is just one day and when the day is done many will continue on with their lives and for many those family members we hugged and kissed won’t be seen for another 365 days unless death occurs. </span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white;"><span style="color: #674ea7; font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Thanksgiving is definitely a day that many look forward to, but it shouldn’t be celebrated just once a year. Our hearts should be filled with Thanksgiving every day. We should celebrate every day. We should always be thankful of all the blessings that we receive and appreciate that in which we do have more, than that in which we don’t have. Everyday is Thanksgiving because we have yet another day to create memories, another page in our life that we can direct and another day to fight our battles. So as you eat, drink and be merry today remember Thanksgiving tomorrow and the day after; and I don’t mean because of the leftovers but because of God’s grace and mercy. Give thanks for the new day & thanks for unknown blessings that are surely on the way. </span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white;"><span style="color: #674ea7; font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">“It is not happy people who are thankful .... it is thankful people who are happy”💕💕💕 </span></span></div>
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I never cared much for the holidays, it was always a weird vibe for me, maybe because my family really didn't come together as much as others. But this one year (Thanksgiving 2013) I don't know how I talked my mother into this Thanksgiving dinner at our house. It was something we had NEVER done before, to have all my grandmother's children present, along with their children and their children, etc ... you all get the point right. This picture below captures everyone I want to say, minus 2 grandchildren and minus 2 great grandchildren who weren't even born nor a thought; because Monique didn't have an army of kids back then LOL ... This picture ended up being one of my favorite family photos for many reasons ... </div>
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1. it showed me that I wasn't having any kids because it seemed we only made girls recently</div>
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3. none of us knew that this would be our final picture taken with Mikey. Exactly one week later he died. And every time I look at this picture and my brother with his arm around him and me holding his daughter that he left behind it reminds me of how thankful I was that we were able to pull this event off and come together for this one day but saddened that we didn't do it more often ... because our next gathering was his funeral. </div>
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<span style="text-align: start;">Today, I’m aware of the fact that life is way better than I deserve. The world is full of pain and suffering, hardship, disappointment and regret. So the fact that I am learning to be much more thankful and </span><em style="box-sizing: border-box; text-align: start;">mean</em><span style="text-align: start;"> it is, in its own way, a miracle. </span>I’m learning there is a responsibility that comes with privilege. That I am blessed to bless. Gifted to give. Many of us are not lucky or fortunate; but what I have learned is that I am <span style="box-sizing: border-box;">expected </span>to do something with the grace I’ve been given. And so are you. <b>Being grateful is a choice.</b> </div>
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So once the day has died down, take some time, wherever you are and whatever you’re doing, to come up with a gratitude list. If it doesn’t come naturally, don’t let that stop you from still giving thanks. There is still much to be thankful for, if we only have eyes to see.</div>
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Happy Thanksgiving ⭐</div>
</span></span>Nyehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16050097056737271050noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3871346540371997311.post-43568146147422645522018-11-14T12:22:00.002-05:002018-11-14T12:22:56.362-05:00Morning Message 11/14/2018<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><i><span style="color: magenta;">"Sometimes the weight you need to lose isn't on your body"</span></i> Now let me be the first to say that I can definitely benefit from losing a couple of pounds and that's without a doubt, but in life with everything that can possibly be discussed it's always different levels and perspectives of it. Often at times we allow the people around us to get inside our minds and eventually some of these people talk us out of our blessings. People will try to get you to quit pursuing your goals, your dreams, your aspirations and much more, because they don't see the vision the same way you do and believe me that's fine. Let me remind you that we all don't have the same eye sight, my 20/10 visual acuity isn't the same as your 20/10 visual acuity. The reality is I see my dreams clear through my 20/10 and you see it only through your 20/50 visual acuity and that's probably why you wear those glasses. Basi<span style="background-color: white;">cally, what I am trying to tell you is that you need to focus on growing relationships with those who will invest in your growth. <b><span style="color: magenta;">GROWTH</span></b> = Spiritually, Mentally, Emotionally, Physically, Financially, Socially, any good "ally" you can think of. Now let me be clear that when I say financially I don't mean someone who is going to take care of you either, but someone who is going to help you grow financially, by setting goals, helping you budget if you didn't do that before, having a savings plan, those kind of things, etc. </span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><b><span style="color: magenta;">You can do better! You deserve better!</span></b> You have to be able to reassure yourself this daily. Sometimes, several times throughout the day too. Positive self affirmation is key. If you desire greater, you have to do greater. If you want better, you have to be better. Everyone that is supposed to be around you on your journey will be there ... and everyone else will either catch up later! But in order for many of us to get going we have to let go of some of this weight so that we can fly. <span style="margin-left: 0.2ex; margin-right: 0.2ex;"><img alt="❤" data-goomoji="2764" goomoji="2764" src="https://ssl.gstatic.com/mail/emoji/v7/png48/emoji_u2764.png" style="height: 24px; margin: 0px 0.2ex; vertical-align: middle; width: 24px;" /></span> <b>Is your spiritual well and clean?</b> What are you holding onto right now that is potentially preventing you from moving forward in life? Is there anything or anyone in your life that is dragging you down? If so really ask yourself WHY? Is it a grudge? Is it a hope? A wish that never came true? A fantasy? A desire? How long have you held onto it? Better yet the real question is how long has it held you in place? You’ve got to let go. We all are guilty, we all do it. But we have to let it go. Because it’s dead weight. Old news. In the past. Gone.</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; color: black; font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">Not everyone will be happy for you. I mean come on, how many times have we heard this shit before? Trust and believe me when I say that is ABSOLUTELY POSITIVELY okay because God did not create you to be a people-pleaser. OK, let me repeat that ... </span><span style="background-color: white; font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"> <b><span style="color: magenta;">Trust and believe me when I say that is ABSOLUTELY POSITIVELY okay because God did not create you to be a people-</span></b></span><b><span style="color: magenta;">pleaser<span style="background-color: white; font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">. </span></span></b><span style="background-color: white; font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">He wants us to be our authentic selves without having to justify every decision we choose to make. Do you know how draining that is? Waking up each morning putting yourself down just because you made a decision that will benefit yourself? Do not allow the enemy to steal your joy because you want to be free from whatever held you bound. </span><b style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">(1 Peter 5:8)</b><span style="background-color: white; font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"> Take everything back that the enemy stole from you and fight back. </span><b style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">(John 10:10) </b><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">When you don't fight, you don't win.</span><b style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"> </b><span style="background-color: white; font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">It is not worth you losing your hair, gaining all that excessive weight, spending less time with your kids or taking it out on your kids, your personal time, spending money anyhow, or doing foolish things just for people to stay in your life or like you or even love you. Over the years and definitely more so recently, I have </span>learned<span style="background-color: white; font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"> to </span><b style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">LET PEOPLE GO IN LOVE <img alt="" data-goomoji="1f495" goomoji="1f495" src="https://ssl.gstatic.com/mail/emoji/v7/png48/emoji_u1f495.png" style="height: 24px; margin: 0px 0.2ex; vertical-align: middle; width: 24px;" /></b><span style="background-color: white; font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">, and it is not because they are bad people, but they just can’t go where I am heading towards. Remember God does not always keep people you expect to be in your life. When you are transitioning to a new season of life, the people and situations that no longer fit you will often fall away; don't fight the process .... </span><b style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">LET THE WEIGHT GO !!! 🦋</b></div>
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Nyehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16050097056737271050noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3871346540371997311.post-13753801909459148642018-11-13T14:08:00.002-05:002018-11-13T14:08:54.657-05:00you never know what tomorrow MAY bring ... There are moments in life when you miss someone so much that you just want to pick them from your dreams and hug them for real. 💖 There are many days in this lifetime in which we often try to forget but then there are so many that we want to remember. I guess it is safe to say that God has a way of placing you in a position where he feels you need to be even when you don't want to be there.<br />
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May 31, 2004; I lost a big part of my life ... my grandfather. I always thought that would be the hardest death I'd ever have to deal with and then in late 2016 I decided to leave from North Carolina and head back to Connecticut. No real game plan in mind, no clue of what was going to happen, no actual direction but all I thought I knew was that I was sick and tired of being in North Carolina and the time was now. In October 2016, it felt like a family reunion, my best friend was home and even though things weren't back to normal it just felt good to be around for a little while. Every year that I can recall you never missed a beat, every Mother's Day I received a card thanking me for not just being the best big sister ever but for being the other mother in your life, and then it became for being the other mother in Aniyah's life as well. For every dumb dream I had, you supported. For every idea you had behind those cement walls, I supported, whether by printing the resources you needed and mailing you the documentation to get started or ordering books by the dozen on Amazon for you to expand your knowledge because what many didn't know about you was how much of an intellectual you were. Less than a year later the world came tumbling down. You know the saying, "cherish those you have in your life because you never know when they won't be here anymore" and it's so sad yet so damn true. IT doesn't matter how much we try and calculate our days here on Earth, our time isn't determined by that of our own schedule's (Job 1:21).<br />
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Mother's Day 2017, you were actually home. Not confined to any cement walls, my card wasn't coming in the mail, I actually wasn't putting money on an account to hear your voice ... life was good. The first part of my day consisted of taking mom out to eat at her favorite place ~ BBQ's and the whole day I complained to her and Fallon about not getting me a gift LOL! I kept telling them all I wanted was flowers for Mother's Day. I wanted to be able to receive my flowers while I was alive, not when I was dead and couldn't see nor smell them. But as the afternoon settled and our date was done, I proceeded to drop mommy off to spend the evening with you and your little family, because even though I took her to her favorite place you cooked her favorite dish; prime rib or was it brisket? Either way, you always were here favorite, such a mama's boy! But you were my favorite out of all the brothers and sisters God blessed me with. I was able to see something within you that I always prayed one day you too would see within yourself ... in due time. As I got home, to my surprise I had a gift and immediately tears were coming down my face. Because all I wanted was for someone to give me flowers while I was still here on this Earth 🌍 and not wait for me to be dead and gone, and on my bed was my annual Mother's Day card along with a bouquet of flowers from you. I couldn't do anything else but cry. This ....was ..... US. 👫💕 My text to you read "next year I want a house, LOL!"<br />
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But deep down in my heart it could have been another card or no card just your presence & that alone would have been enough, but again in this world God has this plan that doesn't include what we feel we want nor how we want and definitely not when we want it. Sometimes God breaks our hearts to save our souls. He has a reason for allowing things to happen. For we will NEVER understand His wisdom, but we just simply have to trust His will. 13 days later I died ... 13 days later life ended ... 13 days later the ending was right there in front of me. May 27, 2017; my best friend was gone. When you were confined to those cement walls I dreaded those phone calls but yet and still I thanked God that you were where you were because society couldn't touch you and you couldn't become a victim or a statistic out here in these streets. But on May 27, 2017; my dreams from years ago turned into my reality. That phone call lingers in the back of my mind, it still touches my soul somehow, I still feel numb when I hear my god mother's voice crying on the other end, and can still see the images of me rushing to pick up our mom from work and get to the hospital. Me knowing that I needed to be there this time, because the last time you were shot you told the doctors not to let anyone in to see you while you were in the ER until I arrived. This ... was .... US 👫💕.... That's just what our relationship was and what it meant to you, and this time I had to be there. None of us were allowed to see you upon arrival, you were rushed straight to OR, they gave us no updates, we all just waited and prayed. Sitting in the hospital lobby waiting with worry in my heart not knowing what was going on was probably the worst feeling I ever experienced. As I looked around; suddenly in the hospital gift shop display there she was ... grandma 👼 !!!! It's crazy because at that moment, I thought to myself either she is here to take him home with her or she is here to assure us that he is going to be OK! Now no to anyone reading this, our grandmother wasn't there in the physical form but in Bridgeport Hospital's gift shop display case it reads "Daisy" with flowers and never in all my years of being in the hospital did I notice it until this very moment and I knew something was occurring. When they finally allowed our mom to head up to OR, it was horrible because the text read "he's gone" and I immediately dropped down to my knees in tears and everyone in the waiting room immediately knew what it meant. A bullet that wasn't meant for you, a life cut short, 13 days after I received my flowers while I was able to smell them my life had ended, 13 days after I had received my flowers now it was time for me to give you yours yet the only difference is you wouldn't be able to see nor smell them ... May 27, 2017 I lost my best friend. One of the hardest things I have ever had to do was bury my brother, because when we buried you a major part of me was buried right along with you. Goodbyes hurt the most when the story was not finished, but it hurts even more when you are just starting to write it together. For awhile, I questioned it all but now I am coming to an understanding of things that aren't meant for me to control. The reality is we will never have all the time we want with those we love ... but one thing for sure is the greatest gift my mother ever gave me besides life itself was my brother (best friend). 💛👫🙏<br />
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<br />Nyehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16050097056737271050noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3871346540371997311.post-25326192663310789772018-03-08T18:02:00.000-05:002018-11-14T12:12:58.210-05:00broken-hearted little girl<br />
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Have you ever had your heart broken? I remember having this conversation with someone years ago, me telling them that I have never had my heart broken, and them being in disbelief. I always tell people that here I am 35 years old, and have never had my heart broken but YES I have been broken hearted by situations, by people, by life, friendships, deaths, failures and much more. Quick to inform those who must know that I have never had my heart broken by a relationship, by a man or even a woman for that matter. But today I was told to stop telling such a lie, I have had my heart broken by a man that I didn't even think to consider. Here I am in my 30's, trying to live my best life, still trying to find myself, and not even realizing how much hurt is underlying the smiles you often see, the jokes that you laugh at, and the kindness that I give to those I love. But underneath this shell lies a heart broken little girl, who has her moments of feeling unloved, unwanted, uninspired, under-appreciated, unmotivated, and most days unbothered. Here I am, realizing that the first man I ever loved indeed broke my heart and I found ways to occupy myself, occupy my mind, and not deal with the true reality. <br />
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The first man I ever loved broke my heart 6 years ago and here I am 6 years later and finally realizing this. Denied because I couldn't classify it as a relationship, when in reality my relationship with my father was my first shot at love, what it looked like, what it felt like, and how I imagined it to be. But here I am, a little girl with a broken heart. Walking through life fearful, tormentful, upset, confused, disturbed, curious, angry, happy, sad, and mad. Mixed emotions that fill me often, and yet I continue to let the world know that I have never had my heart broken by a relationship. We often become so accustomed with blocking things/people out, finding different avenues or outlets to occupy our times and minds that we don't take time to talk about it, pray about it, allow ourselves to be concerned about it, and find ways to heal our minds about it. What I am learning is that sometimes the toxicity we carry can be created from within, and not that in which is given to us by others. The lesson is not always about what you learned, but often about how the situation helped you grow, how it made you better and not bitter, how you were able to cope and move past it and come to terms with it in order to live your best life. We can't force others to love us, want us, need us, be there for us in ways that we want them to, or even how we love them, and are there for them and I am slowly coming to terms knowing that it is okay. Will you be broken hearted? Of course, and you may question it all and ask why .... but instead of questioning and wanting to know the why's work on the how's ... how to make the situation better, how to overcome it, how to cope after it's all said and done, how it will make you stronger, how it is going to make you better and not bitter. <br />
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For all the broken hearted little girls in this world, whether you read this post or not, understand this, it's okay to cry, it's okay to be angry, it's okay to ask the questions of why but let us not get trapped in wanting to know the why's .... give yourself a little bit of time to ask the why's but then regroup and start to focus on the how's. How it will make you better and not bitter, how much stronger you will be once you get through it, how much more beneficial you will become to others once you master how to cope, and how DOPE you really are even on those days you can't really see all that dope-ness that lies beneath that broken heart of yours. I come to you personally, as the broken hearted little girl sharing her world, and finally ready to work on my HOW and no longer focus on the WHY. Turn those worries into love and live life ... truly and without worries. <br />
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Nyehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16050097056737271050noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3871346540371997311.post-46660282845971549622018-02-11T21:25:00.000-05:002018-02-11T21:25:29.570-05:00Heartbreak on the Hudson<div style="text-align: center;">
<img alt="Image result for heartbreak bridge" 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" 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I dated someone ... or at least I thought I was dating them. Time wasn't in our favor, we both worked and both made excuses. Then finally BOOM ... we connect. Yes we connect after all of the failed attempts the time was coming, it was guaranteed, it was a sure thing. Why was I so excited? Why was I so intrigued? What was it about him? Our conversations were sincere, his interest in me was captivating, and his support for things I spoke passionately about wanting to achieve didn't go unnoticed. He was different, he was like a breath of fresh air in a pair of Gorilla Glue inhaled lungs. Some days he was like a slow groove during a spin cycle. He was just different, and it felt like being on top of the Ferris wheel at the hood carnival and viewing the city from a different view, with a new set of eyes. I don't want to say that it was love but it was something worth wanting to know much more than face time calls and text messages. Never ending smiles and good conversation, mind intrigued much more than the body & so it was time, time to quit playing, time to spend time in each other's presence and see if the physical connection existed as much as I imagined it to. Our initial visit was short lived it was a pop up appearance, something unexpected but just enough to make a person smile. Our time together would come at a wedding. I am thinking to myself, well damn what better place to explore each other's souls than in a place filled with love. I want to look good, I want to smell good, I want our vibes to connect, I want to know if the plan moving forward is you and I. I'm all in. Surrounded by love and laughter, here we are at this wedding, guests of honor, but what I am honoring more than the wedding itself is your presence. Chill, let me keep my cool, let me stay calm it's just what I keep telling myself, put your guard up, play hard to get and keep the butterflies in the cage. This is all I keep periodically telling myself, from me parking my car at your home and you greeting me telling me how nice I look and how good I smell. During the car ride to the wedding and even to the reception, and even when I decided to put on my flip flops for the reception and you offered to hold my shoes, I just kept saying to myself "chill yo, don't let it loose." So we laugh, we smile, we pose for the photo booth and we enjoy each other's company and as the evening whines down I think to myself "damn I wouldn't mind doing this again, spending time with this man." But during my time I spent on the cloud I must've missed something down below. The feeling began to fade and things slowly began to change. I battled with a loss I never expected to deal with for about another 30 years and now here I was having time for my mind to wander and my soul to ache and cry. Time goes by and then all of a sudden a few months and not many but really what felt like two weeks passes and a picture is posted and my mind thinks "damn" maybe what I felt wasn't really worth feeling. I think damn, what did I miss? Did I not get the memo? It was all good just a week ago right? OR was I wrong? Here I was, sitting here asking myself a million and one questions while my heart felt left behind on the Hudson .... and I didn't fight to have it back, I just left it there to drown, on the Hudson. Time went by, pages were put on my block list, numbers were placed on my block list, I was just in a space where I left that part of my heart on the Hudson. And now here I am asking myself, why didn't you go back and get your heart from the Hudson? Sometimes, our pride is so big that our eyes can't see over, around or under it ... and this is where the story ends but everyday I want to ask him, if I came back to the Hudson for my heart would you meet me on the bridge?</div>
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<img alt="Image result for meeting on the bridge" 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" 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Nyehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16050097056737271050noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3871346540371997311.post-69325663576719582372018-02-06T23:55:00.002-05:002018-02-06T23:55:33.959-05:00Going Dutch. <div style="text-align: center;">
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Is a man still considered a "provider" if you all split the bills 50/50, and does it change your respect for him? I feel as if I have had this discussion year after year just to see if opinions change. The topic came back up recently and then someone posted it via snap chat and another discussion occurred.<br />
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Now let's be clear that the discussions were based upon relationships, not marriages. Can it be relative to married couples? ABSOLUTELY ... but this is geared towards couples. About a week ago I was at lunch with a friend and we were discussing bills, splitting bills, being tired of paying bills, all the things that we do as adults and my question to him was "who pay's the bills when you live with your significant other?" I have honestly lived with my significant other one time and it was tough for me. Not tough because he didn't have the finances to pay the bills but tough because at that point in time I felt I couldn't allow anyone to pay my bills, especially in an environment that I had developed and obtained prior to meeting them. My ex would literally sneak and pay bills behind my back and could you believe I would get upset? I KNOW !!! You may be reading this like "that girl is crazy, I wish someone would help me pay my bills" but I was much younger then compared to now. Now let's be clear that even today I am still a bit skeptical with just letting someone pay my bills, but I wouldn't mind splitting some bills right about now. The cost of living today is much more than what it was when our great grand parents were shacking up, so I don't look at a man as any less of a man if he wanted to split the bills. Now what would make look at him differently is if he didn't contribute at all or at least played his part or carried his own weight.<br />
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So how do you decide the household bills? I have chatted with many male friends who believe the bills should be split 50/50 and I am not one to argue with that because saving 50% of your money every month is better than not saving any of it. I was told that a "true gentleman" would pay cover the household bills depending on how he was raised, because in the older days a man provided for his home. Now do I disagree with that? Not one bit, I wouldn't mind someone covering all the bills but after awhile I would probably feel uncomfortable about that. Some people are genuine caretakers and sometimes you have to be cautious of others. You may end up breaking up and next thing you know, your ex is telling everyone about how they carried you financially the whole relationship.<br />
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Do you determine the bills based upon income? What if your girlfriend makes more money than you? Does it turn into a 60/40 ordeal in your household? I stated to my friend that if I lived with my significant other and they decided to pay the rent in full each month then I would agree to pay for the other expenses such as, electric, gas, cable, and internet. I was told that's a fair agreement but at the end of the day it is about the discussion you both have with one another. If you are dating a man and he immediately indicates 50/50 split do you still consider him a provider? Do you look at him differently? Are you judgmental about his decision?<br />
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I personally don't mind the 50/50 deal, but it has to be rules and regulations behind the 50/50 plan. The bills must all be accounted for and identified for sure, and a joint account needs to be in place. Now this joint account would solely be for household bills and nothing else. If our household bills total $1200 for the month then the agreement is we both contribute $600 per month into this joint bank account. Anything outside of that doesn't concern me, your money minus that $600 is yours to do whatever you please. Again, the household bills is the priority to me. In a lot of relationships, discussing finances can be an uncomfortable conversation but what one must remember is that moving in together can be a great thing. So let me recap real quick with the top 3 options of living together with your significant other:<br />
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1. Split the bills down the middle.<br />
Again, for many couples this is by far the easiest thing to do. It especially works great if both individuals have similar incomes .... and BOOM there we have it, INCOME!<br />
Income is one thing many couples (not married individuals) couples hate discussing. I am one to agree because honestly why do you need to count my coins? Often at times when people are aware of what kind of money you make they try and use that to an advantage. Example: you make $15k more than me a year, you can handle paying the rent alone which leads to my 2nd option of living with your significant other ....<br />
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2. Split the bills based on percentage.<br />
If there is a significant difference in the amount of money each person makes then a percentage seems fair, but please let the percentage be reasonable such as a 60/40 ordeal. Now let's be clear that the difference must be a meaningful difference in $$$. It can't be because they make $3-5k more than you a year, a good example of a significant difference would be if you make $75k a year and your boyfriend makes $50k a year, then ideally the person who makes the most amount of money would be responsible for 60% of the household bills. Sounds fair right? But just in case you don't like option 1 or 2 then it brings me to the final option of living with your significant other ...<br />
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3. Pick and choose.<br />
Some couples believe in pick and choose. For example, let's say the agreement is to split the rent 50/50, great start, and then the remainder of the bills is a pick and choose. He may choose to pay the electric and water bill and you end up with the cable bill. Everyone has a responsibility when it comes to bills in the household.<br />
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Regardless of how you choose to split the bills, an amicable decision must be made and preferably before you decide to move in together. Many things change over the years, but one thing that remains the same within many relationships is the stress factor about money. Money is one of the biggest stresses in a relationship and the leading cause of many arguments.<br />
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Nyehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16050097056737271050noreply@blogger.com0