Monday, May 2, 2016

does social media + relationship = DRAMA?

Image result for following your significant other on social media

Today's blog topic was provided by a guy. I always share and give credit where the credit is due. And being how the topic was presented to me it's clear to say he wanted my opinion on the matter. So let's dig into it a bit .... social media can put a lot of extra stress on relationships these days. With all of the privacy of social media, it's sometimes impossible not to think about the fact that your significant other might be inappropriately liking someone else's photos on Instagram or getting down in the DM's on Twitter/IG/snap chat  (cause we all know that's where it goes down). It's a lot to stress about, especially if you're in a new relationship or have been cheated on in the past. Odds are, whether you'd like to admit it or not, if you're dating someone, you've thought about their social media habits before. And if you sit here reading this and say "no not me Nye" please stop lying to yourself.

While many people are quick on the trigger, ready to post every single life moment on snap chat, IG, or Facebook, and tweeting every funny moment sometimes the reality is that you should hold back a bit. The same way many post the good they also post the bad, you and "bae" going thru it (vent on social media) and please don't act like we all don't have a friend/relative who does this from time to time and you are always asking yourself "why she still fck w him, he's a bum!" The reality is that instead of focusing on documenting the relationship on social media you should be focusing on the relationship itself. 

Image result for relationships and social media

It’s OK to be private on your social media accounts. However, if your significant other is too private, this could be a red flag. This is always a touchy topic ... often women feel like "if he don't post me he don't love me" and I am not sure why that is ... somethings are better left unsaid but then again if he is parading on social media like he is single then it's definitely something to question. On the flip side, too much PDA on social media sites can also be questionable. Sometimes the couples that post too much are trying to overcompensate for their unhappiness and make it appear otherwise. It’s always nice to leave a little privacy when it comes to a relationship.Social media can become quite a problem if it’s taking over your partner’s life. If your date night is looking a lot like you talking and your significant other looking at his or her phone, spending majority of the date snap chatting or tweeting you might want to shut it down.

Some would say it's a pivotal point in a relationship to follow each other on social media because it gives you the convenience/chance of getting to know your partner a bit more. But my opinion on that is so does communication !!! It has been said and proven that most people in relationships use social media to monitor their partner's. And always keep in mind those happy posts doesn't mean that the couples are always happy ... we don't know what all happens behind closed doors. 

Despite my personal opinions and stance on social media networks, many girlfriends, boyfriends, spouses, side chicks, and hook-ups do follow each other . For some, it’s a non-factor in a relationship, but for many, it’s a major source of controversy and brings about difficulties in a relationship.

The fact is, some marriages and relationships have ended due to inappropriate social media behaviors, pictures posted, words posted, etc. We’ve all heard stories of spouses who chose to seek attention from others on numerous sites and apps. It’s not that social media is the cause of these indiscretions, but it is most certainly a tool that has made it easier for those who choose to step out. Now let me back track and let's be clear ... if someone is going to step out on you they WILL DO so regardless of social media or not ! (now back to the topic)

Image result for relationships and social media

On the flip side, there are some couples that have chosen to attack the “evils” of social media by either creating a joint page or giving the other complete access to their account. Some significant others have established “rules” about what should and should not be shared with the world, specifically regarding children and very personal matters. But when rules are set is it out of respect or more so control?

Determining you and your partner’s social media rules is, of course, all subjective to YOUR relationship. It is each individual’s choice to either use social media with good or bad intentions. If you have to question what you are about to post and if it will be offensive to your significant other then chances are it just may be. No matter what, for a relationship to be successful in spite of social media, there absolutely must be a level of respect. If the level of respect isn't there why is the relationship still in existence?




How do you use social media with your partner? Do you have strict rules or just let it flow? Should you avoid following your significant other? Chime in let me know ... leave some comments and fill me in, I would love to know. 

Image result for relationships and social media

As always ... love is love, peace and blessings and thanks for viewing/sharing/liking and all that good stuff. 

No comments:

Post a Comment

It’s going to hurt until you heal …

  Have you ever been in a dark place yet somehow God still used you to be a light for others? Every time I mention this line to others it’...