being the other woman.

Women have this power that at times we often sweep under the wrong. It's called intuition. 

in·tu·i·tion
noun
the ability to understand something immediately, without the need for conscious reasoning.

Sometimes we know what's going to happen before it even occurs, sometimes we can sense when things aren't right before it goes left, and it's a power that we posses and often overlook. Case scenario: meeting someone who seems like a great catch, good company, amazing vibes, seemingly too good to be true, and then BOOM intuition kicks in around the same times feelings begin to develop. Everything your intuition tells you can be factual but often the feelings tell you let it go. We hate confronting the truth and would rather leave it as the unknown. 

Being the other woman ... Is it worth it? Are you settling? Don't you deserve more? Is the competition so strong? Are you happy? Aren't you worth more? Are you satisfied? Are there benefits?

I mean I can write a list of questions and thoughts that many women have in mind, some have even faced, and some are even dealing with today. But let's talk about being the other woman. Being the other woman is a tough situation, point blank period. I don't care how you swing it ~ you can't flip it into a positive even if you tried to. It's really no reason as to why men cheat, sometimes people with the perfect relationship step out on their partners. So let's discuss some realities of being the other woman whether it's good or bad ... 

• you are the dirty little secret ... when you are the other woman, you are often kept under wrap. But hell honestly speaking sometimes when you are the main woman you are kept under wrap and the other woman gets more public display than you do. But often whether it's a boyfriend cheating on his GF or a husband cheating on his wife, you will often be kept hidden and not spoken of. Secret text messages, secret rendezvous, and rules and regulations for you to follow. 

• you deal with loneliness ... when you are the other woman and having a secret relationship you will deal with loneliness. YES it is true you will deal with loneliness, something will always be missing. I mean don't get me wrong it will be plenty of moments of intimacy and cuddling and all that good stuff that makes you feel like #1 but it is never enough honestly speaking to deal with the moments when you want what you can't have. 

• society views .... yes even though the reality of being the other woman is so well known these days you still deal with society and their views of you. "She's a homewrecker"  "She's a slut" etc ... it doesn't end with the name calling and whispers from folks but the truth is you will experience it. 

• THE WAITING GAME .... if you are a person who likes things when you want and how you want it then hunny being the other woman is not your cup of tea. When being the other woman you have to wait for the signal (you know like the bat signal to know when things are a go and when you can plan things and make moves. And just because you make plans doesn't always mean it will happen (please know this for a fact) because you are #2 and #1 will always come before #2. You play the waiting game, you thirst for the moments and time you can get from this man. 

• stolen moments and borrowed time ... and here we go. with being the other woman this is what you deal with. Stolen moments and borrowed time. Often you don't see each other every day and you don't see each other all the time and you work around a certain time schedule. HE can't spend the night when you want him too, so you make the most of whatever time you can get with him while you can. 

• you are not and I repeat you are NOT a priority .... the first few weeks are often filled with bliss. You get the emotional highs of being in love and constantly wanting to be with that person however that stage will end when the reality kicks in. Being the other woman definitely does affect you as a person overall, you can't spend the holidays with him, you can't spend time with him when you want and need him the most, you aren't a priority because you playing in the background. 

Being the other woman is a tough ass situation !!! Oh so you thought this was a walk in the park huh? It's like working a job you hate but you love the benefits you can get. So let's talk about how you DEAL with BEING THE OTHER WOMAN .... 

• face the truth ... YUP face the truth ! When you are in a "situationship" where you are being the other woman you have to face the truth. The truth is YOU ARE THE OTHER WOMAN, you don't come first, and he may not ever leave his girlfriend/wife. 

• other interests ... YUP develop some ! Just because you are the other woman doesn't mean you have to lose yourself and invest all your time into this situationship. As long as you have other interests you aren't always worried about what HE is doing while you are not with him, remember you are the other woman. 

• the vision can't be black and white ... if and when you are the other woman you damn sure can't see the picture in black and white. It will often be a bit cloudy (and not w a chance of meatballs) so the picture is gray for sure. Just because you are the woman doesn't make you a bad person but it is definitely a tough situation to deal with. 

• end it ... sometimes it's always easier said than done, especially depending on how far and how deep things have gotten. You will constantly think about this, you may love him, it may be difficult, you may think it will be awhile before you find someone else but the reality is you don't wanna be the other woman forever. Especially when you know that you deserve better ! When you realize you are worth more than a secret relationship and deserve more, you will dwell more on ending it. 

• don't settle ... settling is never an option I don't care whether it is being the other woman or with the color shoe you buy. If you don't love it and it's not making you happy 100% don't settle. 

• look into the future ... I mean right now the present may be enough to fill a void you may be experiencing but let's think long term. Will there be a future in this for you? Will you ever be number #1? If so then who will replace you as number #2? Will the cycle continue on? Are you the only number #2? I mean let's be honest ... 

Being the other woman definitely isn't a piece of cake or a walk in the damn park, it's hard !!! Just remember, there are ways to deal with being the other woman. Keep a dope support system, it's always needed because sometimes we fail to see what others do, talk about ending it and definitely know and remember that you deserve better. 
So ladies .... have you ever been the other woman???