Charlotte's Web

I am in a current stage where I am learning how to be alone and be happy. Learning how to be alone without being lonely and losing my mind. Making time to be alone is important for our sense of self and individuality, self knowledge and some unwinding and R&R.  Being alone is essential with learning how to stand on your own two feet again and the most important part FIND YOURSELF! Some people experience loneliness while others celebrate it. Most of us enjoy spending time with friends, laughing and meeting new people. Being alone can be tricky on the mind, as many of us fear being judged by peers when out alone doing things that seem to be meant for friends and companions, like dancing, eating at restaurants, and festivals. The reality is as humans we crave companionship.  Loneliness should not be compared to the fear of being alone. We all have times when we are alone for situational reasons or simply because we have chosen to be alone. Being alone means dif...

You ever knew in your heart that the person you wanted was meant for you and realized after awhile that they didn't deserve you? People don't always get what they deserve in this world.  Ever had someone tell you "you don't deserve me" or "you can do better than me" but you brush it off and don't believe them. Let's stop for a minute and let me tell you this, if someone EVER tells you such a thing BELIEVE THEM !!! 9 times out of 10 they are telling you for a reason. Either they like you or they don't, never try and convince someone of your worth. If a person doesn't appreciate you, then hell they don't deserve you.  The only sure thing about life is that it is in constant motion. Days pass, season changes (winter, spring, fall and summer), people leave, people die, new beginnings happen and things end. The truth is there are some people we are better off without. There are some people who are just toxic in our lives and for...

When we hold onto things and people that are toxic for us, it destroys our spirits in the most horrible way. Why is it so hard for us to move on from things we think we love? Why do we allow ourselves to become damaged goods before letting go and moving on? Have you ever heard that theory "hurt people, hurt people"? Crazy right? But damn it's so true. And sometimes people don't even know why they are hurting but deep down inside their sole purpose is to make you feel how they are feeling, even though they don't know why they feel the way they do. *sighs*  Now when I talk about moving on it doesn't necessarily mean relationship wise but other areas of life as well. It could be moving on from your current position/job, moving on and letting go of friendships that you may have outgrown or God is showing you that the purpose is no longer there, moving on and living life on y our own terms (w hether it means packing up and moving away from your fam...

Sharing a great video which was shared with me #stayblessed

How aggressive is too aggressive when it comes to meeting and conversing with men? The dating game can be quite tiring but it makes it even worse when you meet someone and they are aggressive from step 1. I always thought when you meet people, it's often about meeting somewhere mutual and getting to know each other. Court each other for awhile, go out on a few dates and see if the vibe is there and if you want to continue forward or say "thanks but no thanks this isn't for me". But lately I meet a lot of guys who obviously don't know the steps and procedures with meeting new females or maybe they are used to a certain statue of females. Maybe the word aggressive isn't exactly the correct one but as of right now I can't think of any other word but that one ! If I met you randomly on a Saturday afternoon what makes you think I would want to come to your house within 2-4 days and "watch movies and chill". Now I could be wrong but I never am so t...

Whether it's 2 weeks or 2 months a man knows' whether or not he wants to be with you. Don't string a dead situation along hoping that you can revive it. Live. Laugh. Love. Learn.

Because we are always a walking work in progress <3 #stayblessed 

Well good evening, here we are again another blog for the masses. Do you see the image above? This is my idea as to what will happen if I were to date my best friend (the bottom half). In this day and age most females have male best friends and a lot of men have female best friends. But have you ever thought of crossing the lines of friendship? Have you ever crossed the lines of friendship? If so how was it, was it weird, did it last, did it die and your friendship died along with it? I grew up having 8 brothers (I always lose count, my dad was definitely a rolling stone) so I always adapted to the male species a bit better than the female. So therefore I have always had a male best friend or two. I always felt like one of the guys so it was cool plus it's always nice to have a male's point of view on why we (women) feel they are assholes at times and wanting to know why men are such unemotional beings. But nonetheless I have had great male friendships. Now, I have neve...

OH AND COFFEE :-)

We all hate to hear this phrase especially as women, because we are often emotion beings and when we meet someone whom we feel like we can build with very often that person just doesn't want what we want. Do you know why we hate the phrase? Often because it's true. Yes and we have all heard the phrase "truth hurts". But it doesn't always have to. We have to be aware that often at times when we feel like we are love high and enjoying this new situation our partner may not be feeling the same. Sometimes we are so consumed in our thoughts that we miss the red flags. So let's kind of review some of them and keep in mind there are exceptions ... he talks about his ex frequently; now it is fine to bring up an ex a time or two but often under very neutral conversation between each other. But frequently discussing your past relationships is tacky and it may also imply that maybe, just maybe that there are some still unresolved issues lingering in their mind, ...

o·ral sex noun sexual activity in which the genitals of one partner are stimulated by the mouth of the other; fellatio or cunnilingus. Doesn't it feel like you can talk about sex and the things surrounding it until you're blue in the face? Well here we are again .... sex .... but this time let's talk about oral sex.  Is it a deal breaker if your partner doesn't like giving or receiving oral sex? Somewhere possibly in the year of 2000 and something oral sex became all the rage with my generation. Sex became not enough to satisfy the needs of most people. It was all about oral sex, sloppy top, licking the clit and so much more (maybe we can blame Lil' Kim LOL) but nonetheless it has become like a requirement for some people in relationships, just like when driving a vehicle making sure you always wear your seat belt kind of requirement.  But the question is this ... can you still have a great relationship without oral sex? Forepl...

So here we are again, another great topic to discuss the curious minds in the world. Sex but a little bit deeper into the realms of sex ... when to start having unprotected sex? Now personally I don't know if it is really a time frame one can put on this question because everyone has their morals, values, fears, beliefs and opinions on this subject. Whether it's 6 months or even 6 years there will come a time when you and your partner may question each other as to whether it's necessary or not to use condoms anymore. This is really a topic that should be discussed with your partner but NOT when you are in the heat of the moment. Whether it's a lack of access to condoms (which it should never be - especially when clinics damn near give them away for free), relationship status (boyfriend/girlfriend), or the all time favorite line "it just feels better" the decision itself opens up a lot of variety of risks. Risks can be sexually transmitted diseases, preg...

Why does it seem the older you get the harder it is to meet people? Where do you go once you begin to enter the 30's to meet great like minded people? Remember when we were in our early and mid 20's and the ideal place (so we thought) to meet people was the club ... go out on the weekends or during the week and meet a somewhat potential who possibly purchased you drinks all night and had good conversation over loud music? When you think back you probably sitting there asking yourself "have I ever met a good potential in the club?" So where do people go in their 30's to meet other singles? Now if you are like me and possibly a homebody you are expecting to meet someone great right outside your front door and it may not ever happen, unless that great guy/gal is the postal worker, UPS/FED Ex worker or ironically knocking on the wrong door. So let's talk about some potentially good places to meet single folks :-) the market; now I don't know if ...

piv·ot·al adjective of crucial importance in relation to the development or success of something else. Let's talk about sex .... I mean we are all grown so let's have a grown folk discussion. Is sex a pivotal point in a maturing relationship or a relationship at all? When I mentioned that I was going to write about this topic to my best friend the first thing he said was "YES" followed by a bunch of emojis and what not ! But let's really discuss as to why it is or isn't .... of course it has some pros and cons. Just look above and read the definition of pivotal. Is sex that important in a relationship? I have had some folks tell me yes because a great sexual chemistry can often mean a great relationship (I DISAGREE). Sex is good when it's great but I personally feel it isn't pivotal. Let me share why .... I was once in a relationship, a GREAT relationship, I mean I was held on a pedal stool so high I felt like I could giv...

Interesting enough topic, one I feel a great need to discuss because I am single and often I ask myself why is it that you want to be in a relationship? So this is serious. Have you ever sat back and thought to yourself WHY ... WHY DO I WANT TO BE IN A RELATIONSHIP? After endless conversations with single friends, associates and family members these were some points that everyone often mentioned: I want someone to love me and make me feel special and above all else feel worthy. I want to have kids (most of ALL my female friends say this) I don't wanna die alone (granted we never die alone) But often people won't really indicate their feelings of wanting to be in a relationship, some folks want to be in relationship because: they feel empty and feel a relationship will end the feeling of emptiness (and often it doesn't) to be complete  to be taken care of (emotionally, financially, sexually, stability) You are reading this like well isn't that the po...