moving on.

When we hold onto things and people that are toxic for us, it destroys our spirits in the most horrible way. Why is it so hard for us to move on from things we think we love? Why do we allow ourselves to become damaged goods before letting go and moving on?

Have you ever heard that theory "hurt people, hurt people"? Crazy right? But damn it's so true. And sometimes people don't even know why they are hurting but deep down inside their sole purpose is to make you feel how they are feeling, even though they don't know why they feel the way they do. *sighs* 

Now when I talk about moving on it doesn't necessarily mean relationship wise but other areas of life as well. It could be moving on from your current position/job, moving on and letting go of friendships that you may have outgrown or God is showing you that the purpose is no longer there, moving on and living life on your own terms (whether it means packing up and moving away from your family and comfort zone). In my years, these are all things I struggled with moving on from. Sometimes we get so content with what we have that we allow ourselves to believe there isn't greater! There is always greater .... 

I read a quote that said “It happens to everyone as they grow up. You find out who you are and what you want, and then you realize that people you've known forever don't see things the way you do. So you keep the wonderful memories, but find yourself moving on.” 

― Nicholas Sparks

When you step into new life, you learn new things about yourself, you start to realize that your vision for life is different from people you spend time with and often love. And when years are invested into something, whether it's a job/career, friendship, relationship, etc we often want to live in the moment of it forever instead of letting go and moving on. 

“You can spend minutes, hours, days, weeks, or even months over-analyzing a situation; trying to put the pieces together, justifying what could've, would've happened... or you can just leave the pieces on the floor and move the fuck on.” 
― Tupac Shakur


I am a Virgo and I kid you not, we are the most over-analyzing sign in the whole wide world. We would spend weeks and weeks, even months analyzing something before we decide to just say "fuck it" and move on and realize that life can either be greener on the other side or not but regardless of the decision life will go on. I was in a "situationship" (that is kind of like a relationship but more of a situation) for about 7 or 8 years (maybe longer) on and off and me being the Virgo I am, I always analyzed my situation instead of letting it go and moving on. Why do we hold onto things and people who are toxic in our lives? Because often we are so scared to let go and more importantly scared to START OVER ! Another reason is often because of comfort and convenience it's like the silent killer of many things right after pride. 

We are afraid to let go because we are afraid of change. We are often afraid of what may lie ahead for us. Sometimes we really want to let go, but just don't know how. We loose things. professions, jobs, significant others, and friends throughout our whole life. Change comes when we need change .... let me repeat that because it touched me ..... CHANGE COMES WHEN WE NEED CHANGE. Otherwise we would never grow as people. We hold on to things that are not working out because we forget that better things are around the corner. We have no trust. Life is what you make it. Holding on to things which are NOT working, will not make you happy... You can't keep trying to turn water into wine... it'll frustrate you, annoy you, consume you... (there it is, high five ya neighbor and say "I know that's right!) LOL

Keep moving forward, let's not look back. This is another downside that many of us experience. When we decide to move forward and see that it isn't working out the way we want it to work out we immediately look back and think of things to do differently and try to convince ourselves to go backwards. "That is to say; if you have made a decision from your heart to do something, if your heart is true to moving forwards then, there is no need to look back. Our heads, our minds, our thoughts kick in because of outside influence trying to get us to look back. If it's coming from your head; and you feel yourself reaching back - there is a reason for it. If it is your head, mind and thoughts saying let go, but your heart simply can not let go, you need to remember what you truly want. This may be unresolved issues, or a basic need being unfulfilled, but there is always a reason why your heart struggles to let go." If we let go of things, 99% of time our lives will change, but the reality is that often we are more afraid of change than we are of death. What I am learning in my 30's is that I will never get what I truly deserve if I keep holding on to what I am supposed to let go (read the line over again it may apply to you). Letting go can be scary, but we have to let go of things/people who serve no purpose in our lives and what our mission is. By holding on and being afraid to move on, we hold ourselves back from what God has in store.